Dealing with Eldery Parents who have Alzheimer's or Dementia, when you, yourself are dealing with Chronic Pain and Illness...

 posted this on my FB page, and I will put it here also... I will be doing some work on my blog, my book, my new newspaper I have began, as well as some other things around my home, and some thinking about life... and how to deal with some really tough issues.... I maybe "away" from FB for a couple of days. 


There are some things I really need to get to working on as far as this new newspaper I am staring. I can customize is a great deal and it could really help me with my blog, as well as with my books , and my next book...plus lots of my advocacy work...getting information out there that would really benefit many people and help make what I want to happen possible ( I Hope)...I have also had some new ideas for my 3rd book unfold in my mind over this past couple of weeks, and although I jotted some of it down, I would like to start writing on it, in the beginnings of the book itself.... There are also some "personal matters" that honestly came up this morning, mainly to do with all of this mess with my Mother, and at this moment I am totally at my wits end, I have no clue where to go or what to do, other than leave her alone, and allow her to figure out "all is NOT RIGHT in her world".... she really hurt me earlier... calls me well before she is usually even out of bed, wanting to know "why I had not called or been by"...

well for one I was there two days in a row, just yesterday for one, and besides she is usually never even out of bed until after noon time... anyway, she asked me what I was doing, and then she told me I was a "blabber mouth", and I should NOT be telling my own kids what is going on... well I tried to tell her the kids are NOT stupid, and they "hear and see" and then she says they are never here nor never call so how do they know anything? So, I hung up... well I called back about 30 minutes later, and began to tell her to NEVER call me a "blabber mouth" again... that it for one hurt my feelings, and for two was NOT the truth, so then she began to tell me that losing her credit cards, not being able to work her stove, put her car in gear, not pay a bill correctly, not take her meds correctly, not know why the alarm clock blinked etc "meant nothing" and why do I even "care"... it is in the past... 

and when I said MOM jut yesterday I WENT TO GET YOUR MEDS AND GO TO THE STORE BECAUSE YOU DID NOT FEEL LIKE IT... so it not in the PAST it is right now... and she made some snide remark oh well, when we get there or if we do, we will handle it then... well WE ARE THERE! And she cannot continue to live alone, and if I tell the doctors about the car incident and and a couple of other things, they will tell her she cannot drive NOT live alone! As I told her and "building you a room" takes more than a few days.... she began to tell me I was full of crap, and nothing was wrong with her.... so I hung up with Okay, I will not "bother" you again, I am NOT calling, I will NOT come over there, and "if" you need me, then call, otherwise, I refuse to be hurt and used like a doormat and then laughed at when I told her that her calling me a "blabber mouth" hurt my feelings... and she said "she never even called me this morning"..... 

so, I have LOTS of things I want to do and get done, and I honestly right now am so totally sick and tired of this crap.... that she may wind up in a nursing home, if she does not want to listen to me.... I don't know what else to do.... but I need to get some rest myself, and do some thinking about several things... so if you do not see me here much, I am okay, just "out of touch" for a few days....

I NEED HELP as Soon As Possible - I need an additional room built onto the back of my home for my Mom

ANYONE KNOW A BUILDER/CONTRACTOR IN THE ELLIS COUNTY AREA OF TEXAS WHO IS REPUTABLE AND CAN GET THE JOB DONE IN A TIMELY MANNER AND GIVE ME A FREE ESTIMATE????

Many of you may have already read my posts about Mom and how rapidly she is regressing into what I feel is dementia or Alzheimer's. Over the past couple of weeks the situation has turned grave and dangerous... too dangerous for her to stay alone much longer... so I need to build a room for her on the back of my house... see my post below...


Anyone that maybe close to my area in the Ellis County area, or near, that may know of someone that can "build on" a room for my Mom onto my home, along with doing some finishing work on my own home, as soon as possible, please contact me by private message. If you have an idea of someone that can do a great job, at a decent price, give me a free estimate, and will get it done as soon as possible would be so appreciated. My Mom cannot stay in her home much longer alone. Even though I am there everyday, or call if I cannot go over and she is only blocks away, things are rapidly getting too bad for her to stay alone... after all I saw and went through yesterday, something has to go be done and done quickly, Rhia

The Latest Addition of my New Newspaper that goes out Daily "All Things Autoimmune"

Here is the link:

http://paper.li/ravishingrhia/1438808814

 

Above is the LINK to the Latest Addition of my New Newspaper! This Will be Daily, and I update it sometimes twice in a day or so. It has a GREAT DEAL of the latest information about Lupus, RA, Sjogren's, Chronic Pain, Lumbar, Cervical Spine issues, along with other health information for you to read and use. I had began this kind of as an "experiment" and decided I liked it so well, that I would make this a daily, permanent addition to my blog, and my Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter and other social media informational places. It will have things about new Technology, mostly health but other forms also. I am able to choose what it has in it and "tweak" it for my readers. So, PLEASE use this link where you can put in your email address and "subscribe" to the daily addition. It will send you an update if I do an update, so you can have the latest information.

Bear with me, I am doing a "revised
" look and feel. I've upgraded so I am in a learning curve as to how to do some of the new things I want to do. But, until then I post the link daily in FB, Twitter, IN, and so forth so everyone can find the new paper for the day!

 Here is a "thumbnail" of the top portion of today's paper. This way you have an idea of what it looks like right now...

Honestly, I have been quite pleased with the articles and information it provides. It has made a world of difference on researching the subjects that are important for health issues, technology and how it all effects us....

DOCTORS WHO TAKE MONEY FROM PATIENTS UNDER THEIR OWN LOOPHOLES....

This is so "long" to go into but get this... MY "orthopedic surgeon" who did the surgery on my neck, and "was" supposed to do the other next week, is ONE MY INSURANCE AS A PREFERRED IN-NETWORK PROVIDER, UNDER HIS BUSINESS NAME (DALLAS BONE AND JOINT CLINIC)... So, for TWO weeks I hAVE BEEN FIGHTING WITH HIS ASSISTANT because they keep saying they are NOT a preferred provider... I HAD PROOF FROM HUMANA, I HAD REFERENCE NUMBERS, I CALLED THEM MANY TIMES YESTERDAY I WAS ON THE PHONE WITH HUMANA FOR OVER 3 HOURS.... AND FINALLY FOUND OUT HE 'GETS' BY with saying he is "not in network" BY FILING UNDER HIS OWN TAX ID NUMBER rather than THE BUSINESS NAME WHICH IS AN IN NETWORK PREFERRED PROVIDER!!!! So, that means rather than me pay $325.00 FOR MY SURGERY... 

they want OVER $1,200.00!!!! They want the deductible which ONLY APPLIES ON OUT OF NETWORK PROVIDERS AND THEN FOR ME TO PAY 40% of the bill!!!!! I KNOW THAT HAS TO BE SOME KIND OF A RIP OFF.... HOW CAN HE BE UNDER THEM AND IT IS HIS BUSINESS... ALL OF HIS PAPERWORK READS DALLAS BONE AND JOINT CLINIC AT HIS ADDRESSES, AND I THINK HE AND ONLY ONE OTHER DOCTOR IS THERE... SO HOW CAN HE HAVE "TWO" TAX ID business NUMBERS, AND IT BE LEGITIMATE NO ONE ELSE WOULD HAVE TRACED IT DOWN LIKE ME!!!!!! 

Everyone else would have just PAID OVER 1,000.00 and went on so he MAKES A LOT MORE FROM THE PATIENT IN HIS POCKET!!!! I am GOING TO SEND AN EMAIL TO MY CONGRESSMAN, AND WHOMEVER I NEED TO... I THINK THIS IS TOTALLY WRONG, AND HE IS A GREEDY ASS, WHO DOES NOT DESERVE TO TAKE PEOPLE'S MONEY IN ORDER TO MAKE HIS MORE RICH... I NEED THIS SURGERY, BUT HELL I CAN BARELY AFFORD 325.00!!!! HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO COUGH UP 1,200.00 because he is a greedy selfish miser.... I CRIED YESTERDAY AFTERNOON, ALL EVENING... I AM SO MAD, BECAUSE US LITTLE GUYS ARE THE ONES THAT SUFFER AT THE HANDS OF THE RICH!!!!!

PLEASE JOIN ME in My DAILY NEWSPAPER "All Things Autoimmune"! News you Can Use for all types of health issues... and more...

MY LATEST ENDEAVOR TO KEEP YOU, MY AUDIENCE, UPDATED ON THE THINGS THAT MATTER TO YOU AND YOUR HEALTH MOST, FROM RA, LUPUS, SJOGREN'S, TO FM, CHRONIC PAIN, AND SO MUCH MORE!

Autoimmune Arthritic Systemic Life Daily – Rhia

Please join my Daily Newspaper that can give you much insight into the latest information of Autoimmune, RA, Lupus, Sjogren's. Chronic Pain, FM and many more health issues, from the latest news, medications, and information YOU can use! I am currently working to really "update" and make it "customized" for YOU, my audience! Thank you, Rhia Steele "All things Autoimmune"

YOU CAN Make a DIFFERENCE WTH THE ARTHRITIS FOUNDATION ON CAPITOL HILL FROM YOUR HOME!

I share this with you! Since I will not be able to attend the AF Summit on Capitol Hill due to having cervical neck surgery, I am definitely going to be an "advocate" online! This link takes YOU to a letter, that you can personalize So, even if you can't make it to the Summit, you can and tell your own story about how AF is effecting you, your family and so forth. I sent mine in yesterday! ALL of these will be taken to Capitol Hill and given to Congress at the Summit! YOUR can MAKE a DIFFERENCE even from your home for the AF Summit on Capitol Hill!

https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/GVQHGDV

HONESTLY, I FEEL BADLY THAT I AM NOT ABLE TO BE THERE THIS YEAR AND REALLY WANTED TO ATTEND! I LOVED IT IN 2014, AND HAD HOPED THIS YEAR THINGS WOULD ALLOW ME TO GO. MY NECK SURGERY IS ONLY A PORTION AND COULD HAVE WAITED, BUT I ALSO HAVE A MOM, WHOM I FEAR COULD BE SUFFERING FROM SOME TYPE OF DEMENTIA, OR WORSE ALZHEIMER'S. THINGS ARE NOT GOOD AT THIS POINT, AND I FELT SINCE I AM HER "ONLY CARETAKER", I COULD NOT LEAVE HER THIS TIME. SO, I MADE THE CHOICE TO TRY AND DO EVERYTHING I CAN TO "MAKE A DIFFERENCE" ONLINE, THROUGH SOCIAL MEDIA, TO SENDING LETTERS TO MY REPRESENTATIVE BARTON AND TO CONGRESS, AND LETTING THEM KNOW MY STORY! 

YOU TOO, WILL MAKE THAT DIFFERENCE. YOUR LETTERS ARE ALMOST AS GOOD AS BEING THERE ON CAPITOL HILL!!!! 

 

NERVEmber and IPF! Have YOUR Voices Heard about Chronic Pain!

The NERVEmber 2016 committee has been created and the 2016 director is Rachel Smith. *\O/*

We are having our next committee meeting on Thursday, March 19, 2016 at 5pm EASTERN/2pm PACIFIC.

If you are interested in being on the NERVEmber committee please email Rachel at info@powerofpain.org

 

 https://www.facebook.com/nervember/?pnref=story

https://powerofpain.org/ipain-delegates/ 

 

National Pain Report and President Obama Speaking Up for Those in "Real Pain"

This is exactly the type of support we need! Great News and Thank you President Obama for addressing that our pain is "REAL"!

Please spread this link on to everyone you can. We NEED support like this to fight back against those who don't believe our pain is "real" and that we "need" our medications to be able to have some type of normal in our lives!

http://nationalpainreport.com/op-ed-obama-gets-it-right-on-opioid-access-8829657.html 

 Thank YOU President Obama for your words about this devastating illness often "invisible" yet very REAL!

The Latest Daily Addition of my newspaper "All Things Autoimmune".... For Friday morning February 26th....

https://paper.li/ravishingrhia/1438808814#!headlines

The Newest Addition of my Daily Newspaper "All Things Autoimmune" from Chronic Pain and the possibility of Yoga and mindfulness & the Science it, to Green Tea helping Ra (a possibility) a great deal of new information for all of you! Interesting, I drink green tea usually iced especially in the Spring and Summer months, plus I have taken a green tea supplement for years, but more for helping "weight control" due to it's boosting of your digestive system, plus new information from the CDC about about effective the flu vaccine is....


I put my newspaper out daily, and usually I update it and put it out twice daily. The subjects that I usually put out there are things about Lupus, RA, and autoimmune illnesses, BUT, there are also many articles about chronic pain, our environment, about technology, the latest in medical science and its technology and more. So, there is something for everyone in most additions...please check it out and I will post a link daily here for everyone!

Eldery parents,caretakers,your own illnesses,surgery,family matters, Humana and insurance,doctors offices and issues, and more...

 Life is not always  BED OF ROSES... but I would settle for a few soft petals for now...




I am so excited - My NEW CORDLESS Weed Eater Came in yesterday! No more trying to pull those heavy cords around the yard, and I can take this out into the "back forty" also. Plus it is really almost lighter in weight than the corded one, and certainly lighter than the "gas" one. I can't weed eat for any long length of time, but I did discover, as long as I take it slow, and take breaks fairly quickly in between, then I can do lots with it. I can't start my darned lawnmower, because I do not have enough strength in my arms anymore to pull it quickly enough for it to start. It sucks, because I just put almost everything new on it last summer. I put the new pull cord device on it, a new air filter, changed the oil, a new spark plug, and fixed the "baffle" on it that deflects the grass. So, I am hoping my neighbor who used to mow the lawn will still do so, and he can see if i did a good job in the "overhaul" I guess when it plays out on me, I may have to get one that is "push button" for starting or something. I no longer can pull the cord quickly enough to start those kind. Anyway, right now I hope "nothing else" breaks or needs replacing around here. 

I've got the surgery to pay for, a doctors visit tomorrow that will have to be paid in full right now by me... he is my PCP and the ONLY doctor NOT on my "preferred provider list"... Hopefully since Aetna bought Humana, (they are on Aetna's plan) finally it will come together and they also will be on Humana's also... it is so odd, Humana used to carry them as a preferred provider for years.... anyway, I am having HELL with the surgeon's assistant that is doing my neck surgery. I go through hell with them on insurance every time... I FOUND THEM AND CALLED NOW 3 TIMES to make sure his clinic is on the "preferred provider list"... and I have seen it and they told me AGAIN ON THE PHONE YESTERDAY, that they are on Humana's "preferred providers list".... BUT the doctors office said the insurance said that they are not... well the issue is they have it listed under their "clinic name" which Humana tells me that means "the doctor" is covered... and I even got a special number on the phone yesterday as a confirmation that he is a preferred provider that I faxed to the doctors office... anyway, I have a 750.00 deductible on any "non preferred" provider then the insurance will pay 60% of the bill anyway, and then I pay 40%... so if it comes down to it, once that 750 is met, I would owe 40% of whatever, office visits, etc... and sometimes that 40% is actually "cheaper" than the co-pay which now is 20.00 for a PCP and a specialist is 45.00 in co-pay.... anyway, between that, trying to get Mom all figured out as far as her medications, and so forth, making sure I have someone to get me back and forth to the surgery next week on my neck and I think my son will be able to, he has to check with his work, then I will be in a neck brace for about 4 to 6 weeks...

 I will be able to drive after a week or so, but being in that neck brace makes it a bit more difficult, plus my pain pump has to be refilled around the 18th or so.... gosh always something... I won't be able to bend over, so I will have to get "creative" in changing the dogs paper and feeding/watering them... the little one is so full of "pee and vinegar" as the old saying goes, LOL, I will have to be extra careful with him after surgery so he does not trip me, or make me do something to "injure" my neck for the first couple of weeks... anyway we have all of that going on, and some others things, with family going on... I think all of us are more stressed out than we can almost handle... keep your thoughts and prayers with all of us right now.... I know my family will appreciate it for sure... 


My daughter and her family are under a great amount of stress due to jobs issues... things are so up in the air with the oil and has industry, and her husband, my son-in-law has worked with that type of thing now for over 10 years... yet with the extreme drop in oil and gas prices, of course it is taking a toll on so many of the companies that have anything to do with oil and gas right now... It is wonderful for us when we go to the gas station, but a nightmare for so many who may lose their jobs, and so forth. Talk about a double edged sword... so I have her and her family in my heart and am concerned for them, as I know this is a difficult time for them also. He does not really know from one day to the next if he will have a job with the company or not, and after having that security, benefits, insurance and so forth for over 10 years, that is difficult to deal with.