My Own Holiday Dilemna and Life's Journey...

We had our Thanksgiving with family the weekend before. My daughter and her family got to come up from Corpus Christi and I was so thrilled. We all gathered at my son and his girlfriend's home over in Waxahachie (Indian names) LOL ... it is our county seat about 15 miles away... Jim and I took Mom with us ... so it was the entire family ... I got to finally see my 3 Grand Kids ... the two youngest ones, Logan is 3 and James is 5, going to be 6 in December, then her step daughter who they have raised since she was 2, Heather who is now 15! That seems impossible. My daughter started dating her husband when his daughter was only 2. Now here they are with the two boys, Heather is a teenager, and it all seems like just yesterday. I had said in my blog, that I was kind of sad that Saturday. The two smaller ones, especially Logan really don't know me very well. Since they are so far away, they almost "forget" who Nana is. We only see them 2 or 3 times a year, so it is such a huge deal when we do get to visit. Then Thanksgiving Day, ours was very simple also. After that weekend of my daughter's awesome cooking, we were ready for something not so filling. So we cut up some fresh veggies, and fruit ... got some of that low-calorie cheese spread with crackers, and I made some Rice Krispie treats. We visited my Mom for a couple of hours early afternoon, then came home to watch the Cowboys get their butts stomped, and enjoyed the "finger foods". So, ours was fairly laid back and quiet also. Thank Goodness my oven is fixed!!! Over a week ago, I was baking a cake, and our smoke alarm went off. I ran to the kitchen and we at first could not tell anything was wrong. We do have a new smoke alarm and the damned thing is extremely sensitive, so I figured something had dropped on the foil I keep in their and I had not seen it. It kept trying to go off and suddenly I noticed the very top of my cake looking like it was "broiling", yet it still had like 12 minutes or more to go!!! Well it dawned on me, the oven was staying on fully, and with that temperature like that it was as if the cake were in the broiler. So we turned it off.  I took the cake out, then decided heck it was almost done, and was not burned exactly, so I put it back in the oven and it finished baking LOL!!!!! It was already far enough it had risen, but just needed to cook a little more in the center. Anyway, the freaking thermostat we figured must have gone out!!! Right here at Thanksgiving, of course for us, "Murphy's Law", and we had no idea about getting one. So, we got the model number etc off of the oven, and I did a Google search, and found the manual, and the actual part number. At first the only one I found was over a 100.00! I almost fainted ... but then my favorite shopping place, Amazon, had it for 55.00! But, it was of course too late for the holiday, but it worked out my daughter did most of the cooking, and I took stuff I did not need to put in the oven, so we decided to not even cook a huge meal for us, and just do the veggies etc. Then later Thanksgiving afternoon, here comes our next door neighbor's daughter with 2 huge plates of Thanksgiving Dinner after all!!! They had sent turkey, dressing, potatoes, even a piece of pecan pie after all!!! I was already "turkeyed" out ... but Jim enjoyed all of it the next day. :) Anyway, the oven part came yesterday!:) So, Jim found what he thought was the way to put the thermostat in ... which what he found sounded stupid and way to difficult I thought. They had us almost pulling  the burners out etc ... and it just did not sound right. I told him I thought we should be going in through the back, and he almost got pissed at me... LOL!, but I got online and found other instructions that did say part of the thing WAS pulling the BACK off so you could access the thermostat from there, then running the new one through from the front panel that comes off, and to the back, and down through the hole where it goes in the oven. Viola!!! Between the instructions and a little "horse sense" we did get it and I prayed when we turned it on, sure enough; it worked!!! So far so good!  It came on like it should and then turned off when the oven got to the correct temp! LOL! I was shouting THANK YOU GOD!!! All of that, and I was so hoping we had found the issue, the right part, and had put it in correctly...:) I just hope it continues to work... OR a new STOVE will be here dammit. It was a nightmare getting that darned thing in, between his back being so messed up and all of my issues, I thought we both would be in the bed for days after that, well I can't sleep of course, what is new ... and I know his back is once again more painful than usual ... but you know all too well how that goes ... we just have to DIY, do it ourselves, if possible. We would have gone broke having someone come in and repair it ... thus you do what you have to do. Anyway, that has been our "thorn in the side" this past 2 weeks ... along of course with the other crap that goes on with houses, cars, etc.... LOL! Okay I have talked "typed" enough!

Singing out through the "Vocal Soul" of Writing...

As I poet, writer, and even a bit of a "dabbler" into writing song lyrics, I feel I always need to "say" something very special when I write. As that comes to light in my poetry, it is kind of like my tattoo's, each one representing an event, or a realm that was extremely a rare situation for me. I have 8 tattoo's now, and honestly would love to have more. But, due to all of the medications I am on with the Lupus, RA, and so forth, even a very good tattoo artist feared they for one may give me a hard time in healing, plus just due to my thinning skin because of the Predisone and Lupus itself, I may not be happy now with a new tattoo. I was always thrilled with the others, thus after speaking with him, and giving it much thought I decided that was yet another thing taken away from me in my life by illness.
If you are not aware of these types of chronic illnesses, along with all of the medications you take while going through the "slings and arrows" of those, you may not understand just how many seemingly menial and everyday things you used to do, are just not something you may be able to do now. I am sure we often take for granted, (I know I did), everything from a wonderful snow skiing trip, to a new tattoo, to going to Six Flags, heck doing yard work, laying out in the sun, and even washing dishes or getting your hands in dirt potting plants could mean issues with these illnesses. So, now you find that nothing seems "simple" anymore. I must think through just about every damned thing on my "list" I do. Whether it is doing my house work, running errands, going shopping for a day, or an overnight trip to OK to the Casino, you can bet I have to make "extra" steps in order to have everything I need due to my illnesses and pain.
Now, that said, and I am not sure even why I "went" there, I want to get back on the subject I began with... feeling like whatever I write must have a "direction", a meaning, point to something critical, important, and why in my mind it must be a potent potion that seeps into the readers soul and absorbs into the very heartbeat of their life.
I have read a wonderful book on many occasions about this very subject called "Writing Down the Bones", by Natalie Goldberg. she really makes the goal for writers about never being concerned about what you write, but to write!!! As she goes along in her book talking about having journals stacked up everywhere of "junk", "crap", "bad" or what ever you call things you write that are simply something not great by your standards, you write anyway, and everyday. I have been completely in agreement with that most of my life. I have written daily, just about, for 35 years at least. With the exception of times I have been too ill after surgery, etc, whether it be a poem, a piece of "musing", even music lyrics, I write. I also have "journals" full of hand written, what I like to call the "pen and paper of my heart", where I literally love the feel of the pen gliding over the paper and allowing words from your heart and soul to flow like the ink onto a clean white sheet of paper. Honestly, that is my very favorite "way" to write. It seems to cleanse the palette of the soul for me. I feel many of my best works are in those pages and pages of small ninety-nine cent "journals", those small notebooks many of us have with the different color fronts. I have all colors of those and they are filled page after page, some back and front, even in the margins, of my entire life's story... if you read much of those, you would see how I bare my soul, raw and open, bleeding at times, to allow others in so they can witness just how much faith, hope and love I carry around for others.
But, all of a sudden, and I am not sure why, I began to think that if I did not have something of "value" to say, I best not bother to put pen to paper. Why write something I felt was not "good enough" for others to read? Wow, had I either gotten really "stuck on myself", or went the other direction to "lose faith in what my writing meant"? I had made all kinds of excuses in the past couple of years. Now, just due to time constraints (if I ever want to PUBLISH anything, I have to "type" it into the computer), since I would be as slow as the tortoise if I tried to write it in my journal first then transfer that over to the computer, it would be through my eternity and several generations before I could have something all could actually read!!! Yet, I still had made excuses (some very legit) as to why I had not first of all, gathered my poetry (or a small piece of it) and published a book. I used m chronic pain and illness as a scape goat (which was a huge hindrance honestly), thought I was not "good enough", felt I could not find a way to even get it published, was not able to afford it, was plain scared that everyone would think it was horrible and laugh at me, I did not have the tie, I needed to take care of this, that & the other around the house, Mom needed help... boy I had a LOAD of reasons WHY I could NOT get a book out, or my "1st book" out of at least some of my poetry! As I said, some of it very true; illness and severe shoulder and arm pain did really keep me from even being on the computer for almost a year, or even longer (that is when I wrote once again in the paper journals when I felt like it)... yet other were simply what they were, me procrastinating mainly due to fear. I find myself in "fear" of beginning my "book 0 book" as I call it, the ONE that is the main one I want to have published hopefully soon. but, it will be a great deal of work to get all together, and even trying to begin the "1st chapter" often leaves me and my mind totally BLANK!!!
But, when I "changed up my mind" as I said when I was much younger, and made an actual "date" that I would send my 1st poetry book for publication, everything seemed to become crystal clear. Once that very 1st book was on its way to be accepted and printed, my "voice" burst open, and I felt I had so much to say to everyone out there, in the nation, around the globe. I have someting that others want and need to hear. they absolutely need to realize they are wonderful, perfection in their own right, they can have a renewed sense of hope and faith, they can reach for the higher rung, jump up towards that uneven bar of what we call life, take hold and go with it. You are worthy! That is the message, the portion of my soul, my heart, my very entity that I try to give out to those who read my heart's work.

So, I had to STOP thinking I could not write unless I had something "superior" to say, but I can write anytime, any how, any where, whatever it was, I could write it and I needed to do that. Of course as I have grown, evolved, and gained somewhat a tiny bit more wisdom, my writing has also evolved in so many ways. Even though I thought not too long ago I actually LOST my "voice", it had been there all along, waiting for me to pick it back up, and use it, which is great practice. So, wther my "soul" sings out in rhythm, rhyme, and harmony, or it is in the deepest, darkest pits of the brink of "a little unwell and unsettled of mind", or it is elation, honor and glory, music, or just plain old "crap"; all of it serves a purpose.

I am so thrilled to have what has been my best friend through thick and thin... standing right beside me all the way to places unknown or those familiar, my "voice of writing" always remains... faithful and honest!

Rhia November 22 Thanksgiving Day, 2012

Wishing You A Wonderful and Thankful Holiday Season

Yesterday afternoon, I called to check on my Mom. She had lost her house key on one of the local parking lots here after buying groceries, and had to call us to take her the extra one I keep for things such as that. As I spoke to her , the

first thing she said, is "Thank you so much for the beautiful card for Thanksgiving". Of course that made me happy to know first of all she received it (I was running a little late putting them in the mail), but also that it meant enough to her to mention it to me and say thanks. Which of course is what the "season" and the "reason" tomorrow exists. It is for all of us ONE day out of the year to reflect on all of the things we are "thankful" for. So, yes I do send out Thanksgiving Cards, to those I care about, and try to let them know I am truly thankful they are in my life. I send out "physical" cards to my close family, and then for my "extended" family on line, I send out e-cards. I have a very large extended family, and it dawned on me, I really not have a good way to "email" all of you individually with an e card. We can "send messages" to each other, but unless we exchange formal email addresses, we can't send it directly to the people we want to. So, this is my way of saying "THANK YOU" FOR BEING YOU! To each of you that support me, when I am down, out and ill, Thank You, for all that love me just the way I am, Thank You, For all that encourage me to reach beyond and take hold of my dreams, Thank you, for those who have given me so much wonderful feedback on my new book, and who have truly given me a true new reason to write again, Thank You. For every friend here that listens, makes me laugh, makes me cry, provides their love and support often from hundreds or thousands of miles away, Thank you... For this huge community that we call "Face Book" that allows us to meet many, friend many, find out information, provide hope, faith, love and light when others need it so badly, Thank You... and for each and every day that I am able to sit in this chair and share my life with all of you... I am so very Thankful.... I bid you, your families, friends, and to your extended family, A Wondrous, Thankful, and Bountiful Thanksgiving Day! And, may we all be "Thankful" all of the other days of the year for all we are fortunate to receive! xoxox Love you, Rhiannon

News and Updated on "Ramblings"...

We will also be donating a copy or two of my new book "Ramblings of A Seasoned Soul" to our local library. I am going to see if they will allow a book reading, which I believe they do there also. I have thought about also giving one to my High School library, since I was an Editorial writer there for our newspaper and a couple of my teachers in Jr. High and High School were some of the encouraging reasons why I continued to write to this day. They really lifted me up about my early works back then. I have never forgotten some of those things, and also the great feedback I got off of some of my Editorials! I remember writing about our old parking lot at the high school. It was so full of pot holes you could lose your car in them! So, I did a story about having the school get those fixed. I used to have copies of some of the articles, but after so many shuffles around, moving and so forth, they I believe got left behind when I moved up to Seattle WA, which sucks. I wished now I had left them at my Mom's in her cedar chest. But, hind sight as they say is always "20-20"! But, never the less all of those things still live inside of me as great memories, where they shall last an eternity. I think Jim is going to get the information to our local newspaper, and they also do a monthly nice little magazine for our area, and I hope to get an article printed in both of those if possible. My Mom really is so excited and wants to let all of our relatives know, but since she does not get out of the house a great deal, other than grocery shopping and errands, or going with me somewhere, she would love for me to have it in the paper where other relatives can see it. I am finally getting some cards made up and on the way, that can be given out to those I see and want to let them know how to view it online. So, my "marketing" is coming along, slowly, but a little at a time. I appreciate all of the wonderful ideas I keep getting, and again thanks for being such an appreciative and encouraging bunch of friends and as an "audience"... Rhia

Ramblings of A Seasoned Soul "Amazon", Face Book & "Likes"

If you have a chance to go to Amazon and read some of my poetry since it is now up on the "Look Inside" where you can ,please also click the "like" button for FB there(it does not record the "Likes" from my FB page TO the Amazon page. It has to be liking it in "Amazon" first, or please give me a rating of what you think about my poetry, if you have an opinion I would love to know.:) I know it took Amazon a while to get that part up so you could all see the titles and some of

the poems, but hopefully now you can really know what I write and have an idea of some of my works. This is just one small portion of a "sea" full of emotions and feelings I write about. I hope to put another book out from 6 months to a year from now!!:) I may do another poetry book first before I put my "musings/prose book, or my kind of "autobiography" it... you really would not call it a total autobiography per se', and I am not really sure exactly what "category" it will fit in. It will not be fiction, and will be all facts, but it will also include other things besides just "my story" I guess I am trying to say. LOL!!! They will prbably have to "invent" a new "category" for my book...I NEVER do anything like the "rules" say!:):) Anyway, that is a while down the line and before I make it there, I have lots of work to do ahead to get more out for all of you to enjoy. :):) Please keep encouraging me if you wish, I really need to "feel" like I am helping others and giving them some light in their lives... for that is my main purpose for any of this, it to help touch the reader and allow them to feel the warmth and the faith, passion and hope of life!

Rhia's Bio and Amazon and Book Pages

"Ramblings of A Seasoned Soul"- Brush Strokes of Life In Words now has "Look Inside" up on Amazon!!!

IT IS UP NOW!!! The "Look Inside" on amazon for Ramblings of A Seasoned Soul - Brush Strokes of Life In Words now has where you can see inside aand view some of my poetry!!! Go to this URL, click the book and "Look Inside" You will see "Surprise ME!" When you click it, a new poem will come up each time!!! I am so thrilled you can finally see some of my works!!!!
 

 

http://www.amazon.com/Ramblings-Seasoned-Soul-Brush-Strokes/dp/1461061946/ref=la_B009Z901AG_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1353356199&sr=1-1

Autoimmune Illnesses - MS, Lupus RA and More (LIGHT) possibly on a cure to come...

I read this today and it sounds so promising. I wanted to share it with you.

http://vitals.nbcnews.com/_news/2012/11/18/15246299-new-approach-could-treat-ms-other-autoimmune-diseases?lite

Families, Holidays and Being Far Away from One Another...

We had a wonderful visit with my daughter, her husband, and my Grand Daughter and 2 Grandsons on Saturday! We also so enjoyed being at my son's "Better Half"(I am just kidding, but she is a wonderful lady and we are happy to have her in the family) :):) at their home, in which they were gracious enough to host the early Thanksgiving Dinner there. Everything was just incredible. My daughter is an excellent cook, and did a great job with it all. My son in law did a "deep fried" turkey!!! It was delicious! Definitely a new treat to add to the menu as the menu kept growing when we got it all ready. My daughter did most of the cooking, and my Mom slipped in a pecan pie, and I took my son's favorite the banana pudding I make that is richer than rich! I also had my husband do the mashed potatoes. He is famous for his secret ingredient he puts in them... LOL ...between sweet potato casserole, and I did make some home made cranberry salad, a ham, stuffing, rolls, gravy, regular cranberry sauce, and my daughter had also brought her famous pumpkin roll which was absolutely to die for. I think she had orders for 15 last week and already has another 25 or more orders waiting on her when they get back home, which is down South around Corpus Christi. That is what made it so special. We jut don't get to visit as much as we would love, and being able to really have everyone of us in the same home, at the same time together is a special treat. I know my Dad was looking down on us and smiling. He would have really enjoyed all of the food for sure. It was the perfect "holiday" before the holiday, and my only regret is that they could not stay longer. They have the kids to get back in school for part of the week, and of course everything else that goes along with taking care of the family. By the way my son's girlfriend has one monstrosity of a "tournament" sized pool table that they played a few games on before we left to come home!! It is a beauty to say the least!!! She loves to play, and plays on a league, so she really has something to practice on for sure. As always, it is difficult to see them go. It seems we never get enough time to really visit like we would like to. I realized it so much when I was talking to my two Grandson's. One is 5, going to be 6(I believe) and one is 3. I realized when I talked with them, they have been around me so very little due to the distance between us, that they don't "know" me. Not like they would if they lived closer where I was around them more. It kind of "got" to me, when I saw that they almost feel like I am more of a stranger just due to them being smaller and me being not around much... they are not used to having me around them. But, life is life. We must do some things, like live further apart than we wished.. because we must also do what we have to for our own families etc. Yet, even with that I tried to take in every moment and thoroughly enjoy them:):):)!!!!

Speaking of Fleeting Time... How Quickly Family Life Changes & Our Holiday Time Together

Our early Thanksgiving with my kids and their families was so incredible yesterday. We are so spread apart from one another, and even though all in the same state, it is still not often we get to really visit. Honestly, it made me sad yesterday, when I saw that my own two Grandsons, one is 6, going on 7 shortly, and the other is 3, did not really "know" who I am. Oh, they understand that I am their "Nana", but since they only see me about 3 times a year, they really see me as almost a stranger, not their Grand Mom. I know it cannot be helped. We live 7 hours apart. My daughter, of course is constantly busy with them and her home, and my son-in-law of course stays busy working. Due to my husbands type of in home work, we also can't really just pic up any time and leave, and then be gone for several days either. Plus, with all of their activities with the kids, they are constantly on the run, with everything in the sun. I am so proud of them. My Grand Daughter got to know me more when she was here in the same town, and spent a great deal of time with me when she was small. So, even though I don't get to her her as often she knows me much better than the two boys. I am so proud of all of them, and what they have achieved, yet I am saddened by the fact that my own family is really not able to be near for me to experience their birthdays, holidays, ball games, events at school, and all that goes along with Grand Kids. My son is also out of town, but at least much closer. Yet, even him and his finance' don't visit very much. Both of them have jobs out of town and commute daily. They are busy with their own lives, home, activities, so even getting to see them is not something we do very often either. So, yesterday was a very important day to me. Since it if not often that all of them, plus my Mom and I are together at the same time. Sharing the laughter, the food, the interaction, and all of the blessings that surrounded us yesterday brought a very warm feeling to my soul, that i our daily walk of life we often miss, especially with family not very close around. With me being the "only" child, that also in itself brings an entire situation on. I have taken over much of Mom's responsibilities that she has just not been able to handle by herself any more. So, even though our relationship is very close because I am with her often, it is not the same as when we are just relaxed and visiting. Usually we are caught up in paper work, so it turns more in a chore than it does a visit most of the time. I get swept up in the daily things of what is going on with her, either physically, mentally or emotional situations that require something be done at that time. So, even the visit with Mom was much different that my usually time of running over there, talking about insurance, bills, etc.

So, the entire day was lovely! They are leaving out today though. They have other relatives to visit with later later, then they will leave for home probably fairly early

When those moments come along, whether it is with family, friends, or whomever that are not often there, be sure to really "soak" them up, and carry them with you through out your journey. For it maybe a long while before you get that opportunity again. A age comes along, we so much more realize how precious times like that are. Those days of feeling "invincible" and like life shall go on forever go away and give us a feeling of holding onto the precious times that come along, and savoring them as we would a fine wine....

May your Thanksgiving week and Holiday time be filled with precious moments with family, spouses, friends and may you be surrounded by love. Hold closely the things that mean so much to you....

Happy Holiday Week!  Rhia

As time is Fleeting...

It seems each moment we are here, taking a breath, time is just a fleeting "realm" for us. There must be some reason why when we are younger, it seems we have "all the time in the world", or so we think we do. In our younger years we tend to put things off that we probably should do, or choose to do certain activities we want to do rather than really put our noses to the grind stone and get those thing done.
I realize it is a cliche' to say the time gets shorter with age. Yes, that is certainly a fact for us, that a we get up in years our days "seem" more numbered, and the more than likely are than someone young. Even though none of us are "stamped with a guarantee" or "Warranty" of how long our service "Life" is here, we expect those that are younger to have many more years ahead to experience life, than those of us that have already lived for 5 decades, or already past half of their life more than likely. Many things play into the fleeting time for us. Being busy is one. When we are busy times seem to just take wing and fly. Yet for the older ones, even though we may not be "as busy" as someone younger, it takes us longer to accomplish what we do, than it did when we were younger.
I used to be able just a few short years ago, to study my college classes, clean my entire home, do laundry, get the market shopping over with, and be dressed and ready to go out on Saturday night to dance the night away! Now, it takes me three times as long just to do laundry or fold clothes. Cleaning the house may mean a whole day, and part of another one. Whether I am baking something, doing laundry, getting dressed to go out, or whatever task I may be doing at that time, you can bet there is no way I can finish it as quickly as I did just a few years back.
We begin to think about our "mortality" when that "half-century" and damned does that sound old!, mark rolls around. Something else that can hit us right between the eyes is suddenly our own illness coming along that changes our entire quality of life, or taking care of a sick loved one, or the one that had really gotten to me lately is seeing classmates that I went to High School with passing away. That truly is kind of a shock into reality to know we are really getting up to that place things like that are possible, more of course than back when we were "wild and crazy"...
I had spent several of my what I think of as "prime years" in my mid-30's with online groups, lots of online friends, chat rooms, and that whole "new way" to meet people from all over the globe, when it was the 1st time of being a real "hot rage". Now we still have it, but it is different from those first chat rooms we had, on "dial-up" internet at that, but we certainly had fun. There were night I stayed up all night long "policing" mine and talking to friends from all over the world. There are some that I still keep in touch with, and some we still email every once in a while and check on each other. Of course the first ones, like MSN's groups, that were kind of the "original" and I guess "AOL" had theirs also, but I never really got into those. have faded away. But, I had one "group" from a older site that kind of took over after some of those like MSN, Yahoo, AOL, and a few others sold out, closed down, and we were kind of lost out in the array of technology, hoping to meet one another somewhere else one day. And I have done just that. I still run into a person or two on Face Book, or some other blog, etc. and get to ask how they are doing. Amazing what knowing people all over the world feels like. But, this morning as I decided to go log into the old group, I knew it was the very "last blast" at my younger past. IT was a piece of the puzzle of life, that time has changed forever. I will never be that "person" again, for I have evolved and changed. Oh, of course we always keep bits and pieces of our "original" selves around, but we grow, we evolve, we move forward, we make new friends, have new jobs, careers, families, or choose other path ways, that just a few short years back we may never even guessed we would be doing. When I first got to Seattle on October 31 2001,never would I have dreamed how much in the next 10 years my life would change. IF someone would have been able to look into the "crystal ball" of my life and tell me I would be where I am, done what I have done, been through and survived all that I have survived, I believe I would have told them they had to be mistaken. Never in a million dreams did I think I would be back in Texas, in my hometown of all places. The night I made it to Seattle on that bus, and I got off of it, I felt "at home". I cried this morning because even though I have been away from there now since 2005, I still miss it everyday. Life has its own way of taking us where it wants to take us. All too often we may not realize the "why" at the moment. Sometimes it is years before it is "revealed" as to all of the questions to be answered when we find ourselves moving quickly in the opposite direction we really wanted to.
They say if you are "still" too long, just like water, you become stagnant, thus our lives do move as a river, sometimes, slow, winding, and with a small, pleasant breeze. Other times, those waters are like white rapids, rushing us to and fro, jumping over rocks and crevasses, leaping into the air, like salmon on a run up stream, and making us tired of the fight uphill against the currents. Yet, we must continue our climb. We look for faith and love to guide us. Yes< I miss those pieces of my life. I am happy with others that I have now, that I did not have back then. I got accustomed to being "alone" without being lonely. I was liking taking care of myself, all by myself. Even though that did not last for long, there were many lessons learned from that entire experience. From the moment I climbed on the bus in Dallas, made that 3 day ride to Seattle, and arrived at 8pm on Halloween night, 2001 until we climbed into the U-Haul truck from Everett WA, made a short 3 month stay in San Pedro CA, and then got here the 19th day of December 2005, I learned so much more about myself than in all of the other years put together. For that and forever my life is so purely blessed. I would do it all over again if I had the same choices. Although, I still as I have mentioned above, wished at times I was in Seattle, and I miss those times, I realize we don't always understand what is in the works for us, but must accept it with open arms, an open heart, and definitely an open mind.