#Hashtag, Lupus, Blogging, Life, and the Life of everyone who deals with Autoimmune Illnesses - patients, caretakers, family and friends...

My dentist said it was NOT an invasive as a bone graft, and once that is done, then around the middle of November I go back for another set of X-rays to see how well the jaw bones are filling in and healing where the teeth once were. I pray they will be ready for the mini implanted pins and I will get over all of this dental mess once and for all. It has just been not only a pain in the mouth, the wallet and has been a massive pain in the butt. Anyone that ever has to go through the entire process of having all of what is left of your teeth pulled, to then go directly to dentures, and them NOT hold as well as they should... YET, you must wait patiently or for some impatiently... for the bones to "fill in" where the teeth were before you can have the "mini implanted" little bars to hold them secure... I HONESTLY FEEL YOUR PAIN AND SHARE YOUR NIGHTMARE!!! It was not really having the teeth that were left pulled 5 at a time... the "laughing gas" helped to get through that. Besides I am not afraid of needles, even though they are never pleasant in especially the roof of your mouth anywhere... or even the pulling of the teeth in itself. Other than mine being tough as hell to get out (you would think the Sjogren's would have had them degenerated enough that they would come out easier. That is not the case. Mine had a tendency to break, split, fly over the room, and give the dentist a run for his money, as my Dad would have said... But, that last go at the rest of the front teeth, which I had 11 left! Then to have that sewn up and put the dentures right in over the top of all of that where they were pulled... was not a great experience either... Honestly, I still have soreness around my lower part of my nose, and upper lip, even the "hinge" of my jawbones on one side wants to almost "pop" out of place at times. Many people say I am "LOUD" when I speak, but it is surely NOT from my mouth itself being big... in fact it is just the opposite... my mouth is so small, that is why my teeth were so crowded together, even after 2 or 3 molars being pulled thinking I would be getting braces years and years ago, and my 4 wisdom teeth laying cross wise down in my mouth having to be cut out because there was no place to go to pull them out.... I have always had to use a small fork and a small spoon to eat with... there is no way I could try to get a larger spoon in my mouth... like normal people do.... I got my "mouth" from Mom's side of the family as far as bone structure - a great deal like my Grandmothers on the maternal side... yet I got my Dad's side of the family - Teeth... which we all my son, my Dad, My half -Brother, the larger two top teeth in the front, and just a bit larger teeth that just did not fit very well into a smaller framed mouth such as mine. I went for eon's hating my teeth, and you would very rarely see me smile in front of a camera. So, I did get my wish of "beautiful teeth"... after I was 54 yrs old, and had to have mine gotten rid of and had "falsies" LOL.. put in... but hey, they are MINE and they are beautiful... sometimes we get what we want, but just not in the way we expect it to.
Thus, I am trying to once again be patient, hope that tiny little hole that is driving me nuts on the top right hand, where there is that little oral-maxillary fistula or fissure... that just makes it sound HUGE, so I don't really like calling it that , but that is the
medical term for what it is.... By the the while I am still trying to figure out the           #hashtag business of #rhia or #lupus or #rheumatoidarthritis or hummm what about #drcampo wonder what that would bring up... I do have something else I am thinking about doing... and if you care to join in, I would love for you too... One of the bit online health sites had a "blog" kind of contest that everyone could participate in for 30 days during a certain month of the year. Well, somehow I got my wires crossed (what is new)  so I had posted here and on my blog all about it. Then I got to seeing some of what I had actually found online was last year during a month, not new for this year... so of course after finding out for sure from someone there, I took all of it down from my FB page and from my blog. BUT... I had this idea since I sometimes have a difficult time trying to decide what "subject" to go with and write, I would use some of their ideas that I enjoyed thinking of writing about and doing for that the month of November on my own blog. I may mot be able to do it exactly ALL 30 DAYS... but it would be fun to just pick one & try and do one a day and write about an entirely different subject each day. NOW the FUN part is I would LOVE TO HAVE SOME OF YOU GET ON THE BANDWAGON and POST also on my blog... I could post the original idea, along with my "views" on the subject, then have each of you that wanted to - to put yours under it where you click to go and make a comment!!!! I may even make one post and just keep that one going all through the month, doing the same... so if you would like to joint me, feel free to take a look at my blog. I will post a few topics to get started with, and if you can think of something you might like to blog about or read about feel free to private message me here, or on Google since Blogger is part of Google... and we will see how much fun we can drum up :)  I will decide whether to begin "here" on a blog post with the ones for November OR whether to put them on another page... I will let you know for sure this week sometimes....

Perfection we find in one rose... and perfection we seek always in ourselves and into what we feel inside is meek....

Trying to Place "priorities" in the right spot! Difficult to do when you suffer a Chronic Illness

I just said that I was going to go "rest" and watch a movie with my dogs. After all, I am just barely a week out of "major surgery", even though laparoscopic, nonetheless, major anyway, as my Surgeon, Dr. Sullivan reminded me yesterday. I went in for my week recheck, knowing he would turn me loose to ride my exercise bike... Well, his answer was an emphatic NO! NOT for 6 WEEKS!

I gave him a bit of an evil look, and he began to tell me... okay ride that bike, incumbent or not, and when you come back, and those "mesh" panels have pulled away, the next surgery will be big incisions, and not pleasant at all. So, of course to the best of my ability, I am abiding by doctors rules... so today at least although windy as hell, warm enough that I made my 30 minute or so jaunt around our long driveway. So, I did get some exercise in. :)

And I realize he is right... if I did something stupid, and pulled what he has done loose, then the repair of that would be a much more difficult surgery, that would probably mean a hospital stay. I still can't fathom riding that stupid bike would hurt, but okay, I will behave for now.

I am still sore, still purple from my navel, all the way down to my thighs... yes EVERY PIECE of me, is "purple". I won't give the "details" but you can get the jest of it all, since the hernia's are right at the pubic bone, and blood travels downward, when healing begins, thus due to gravity, several "parts" on me that are not usually purple sure are now.

I had to laugh when I was telling him. He basically just came right out and said it, and I sat giggling and agreed ALL of me was bruised and purple!

I am just so disgusted with everything right now, I won't even begin to get into all that has happened in just a few short days... but I will say between the ignorant people at my insurance company, and the stupidity of the "billers" at the hospital where I have my infusions, along with (if I get another automated stupid Call from Humana I am going to scream)!!! I want to say to that recording, QUIT spending MONEY on these stupid calls and pay my damned bills! Of course they see "coding" is wrong, but rather than question it, they just pay it wrong or right... and even if they "underpay" or believe me I had them overpay a year ago or so, and called to tell them they paid for blood and lab work that DID NOT belong to me... 4,000.00 worth! And honestly, I don't think they cared... But they sure as heck care when "their" premiums aren't paid..

I spent most of my walk in deep thought today. In fact my husband said I looked almost upset... but not really at all. I am more in this place that I have to "split" my time. I desperately have to go allow myself to work on my book, and post more of my "own" stuff here on my blog. Not that what I am doing is not awesome, because it is. But, more along the lines of I HAVE to for my OWN SANITY get back to writing my book. No more of this waxing and waning... or feeling fearful... it is time to put that "foot" in the door, and go for it.

So, that is where my thoughts have been this afternoon.

Actually this morning, I just about have the "mini-manual" and all of the "Hubs" and sites set up with the correct permissions and so forth. I just hope they will be able to decipher my manual.

But, I HAVE GOT TO ORGANIZE and split my time up between my advocacy and my own blog and book. I have been so far out on a limb, with all of my new responsibilities with all of the Advocacy and Volunteer work (which I am THRILLED to do), but in between all of that, I've kind of lost my own "path" up the mountain to get my book written and published. Along with not overwhelming my blog, and FB page with too much of one thing, yet not nearly enough of "me"... which is why I do this... for YOU and for ME... so I have got to stick Rhia back into the picture as of exactly who I am, and not lose all contact of what my very real goal is... to write that book, and to have the very best blog I can.

While I walked... I talked... to myself. I have been faced with "one" reason as to why I won't start the first chapter... and "fear" is the only thing I can come up with is "Fear".... not sure what kind of fear, or what I am frightened of... but it seems fear holds me back from putting my eyes on the goal, and putting my fingers on these keys. As Natalie Goldberg says, WRITE...Write Daily... even if you fill notebooks full of crap, write it anyway.... and in my heart of hearts, I know that....

So, if I seem a bit "pre-occupied", or a bit distant over the next few weeks, I am in the process of mentally sorting out all of this. I want so badly to get that book written I can almost taste it. So, as Tiffany said today in a post on Facebook. I have got to put one foot down and the next one in front of it, or it shall not write itself....


I think right now must be a very difficult time of the year for many of it seems.... each person I come in contact with, is having hell on some level....

May be would should have named this Hell 2014!!!!

Thanks for, A Few Thoughts, & To Your and Yours....

I'm just "stringing" a couple of posts together from FB right now. As you shall see below fingers crossed my new computer is coming today. But, as you know that is an ALL DAY affair setting it up, getting my desk back in order, transferring my files onto it from the external drive and hoping I have not lost anything.... So, I shall post a couple of things I wrote in FB the past two days, and in the morning I hope to be ready to "shine" and "scream"... well my computer to "scream" with speed, LOL, not me!!!!

So here are the posts, and I wish you a wondrous holiday... be safe and hopefully as I said in one of these "flare and as pain-free" as possible... Rhia


I just thought of one thing that I was reminded of with it being Thanksgiving Week! Some of us will be with family, friends, some home with our pets. Some of us will be right here with out online friends and family. I am Thankful for the fact that I am so far NOT lying in the hospital as I was when I was 15. I spend 7 days during Thanksgiving holidays in High School having my right knee completely cut open and the meniscus taken out. I was in traction with my leg in a huge heavy cast that was from my bed as far as it could come up in my leg to my toes. I was in that thing 3 MONTHS! Then spend a very long time getting my muscles back to where they did not look like toothpicks. So, that day, my Dad, bless his soul, came to Dallas, and forgo his turkey dinner with Mom and all the family so I wouldn't be alone while I ate mine from that hospital bed. Right now as that memory floods over me, that was THE BEST Thanksgiving of my life! And right now I miss my Dad more than anyone could ever know. He would be 91 if he were still here with us.... May all of you find that one thing you are so Thankful for.... Be Blessed, Be Safe, and Know you are LOVED! 

I've had a couple of really BUMMED days! My computer that was supposed to be here yesterday didn't make it. FEDX had not updated anything on their site until later yesterday evening. So, all day I had no clue even where it was in the delivery. It left Sacramento on Friday, and after that all it said was it was to be delivered on the 26th. I am already SO aggravated with this old laptop. I just can't do much of anything on it. It is SO SLOW, it is worse that "dial up" days I think! So, that had really thrown my schedule off. I wanted to get Thanksgiving "Cards" online out, but I have all of my cards for Xmas to make out. Plus I have NOT even BEGAN my annual Christmas Letter. I have been sending a letter in with out Xmas cards now for years. I made it a tradition a long time ago. I don't believe I've missed very many.  But I don't really even have any "software" on this old thing to do it on. We wiped this drive fairly clean and began using this computer for our music. We had Garage Band on it, and did our clips, and all of our recording and so forth on here. Then Jim can bring it in and send it to his computer where he can actually put it all together for a song. So, things like "pages"(which is like Word) and so on have been off of here for a long time. And the music files have made it very slow, but we don't want to lose any of those. Thus, we cleaned everything off we could, and set this one up temporarily for me until mine can get here. FINALLY fairly late in the evening, yesterday, FEDEX, updated their website. My computer is in HUTCHINS!!!! (YEAH!!!) So, that means it is just down the "street" from me well almost, but it has arrived at the local hub and should be out for delivery TODAY!!!! Thank Goodness! I got up yesterday and was just not about to sit at this thing and be able to not do a thing productive! So, I made my "annual" fruitcake, did some cleaning, and watched some Xmas movies last night with my two puppies... Now if the computer gets here today, then that means all day getting it set up, my desk back in order and things have way back to whatever normal is around here. My thoughts and prayers are with ALL of YOU! 
 Please be safe! I realize many may be traveling or have family traveling and weather is very bad in many places around the nation. Enjoy family and friends, have a very warm, loving and hopefully flare and pain free as much as possible holiday! And Eat a little bit of everything!!!!! We are taking Mom over to Waxahachie tomorrow to a huge buffet over there for dinner (more like brunch).  So we don't have far to travel and right now our weather as far as traveling right here is good. May all of you be blessed and overflowing with all of the things we should be thankful of. Later in the day, whenever FEDEX delivers my new computer, (I think I am still in shock) LOL!!! I'll probably be away for a bit while we set it up. But I will be "screaming" with speed when the new one is here and ready!!! WOOOOHOOOO!! I can finally catch up hopefully!