Being Thankful - Thanksgiving Day, the holiday upon us, and finding true spirit when you least expect it....

First of all Happy Thanksgiving to all of my readers. I am so blessed and thankful for those of you that follow my blog. I know at times, I don't post enough, and since my life has been in a chaotic time in the past several months, I feel as if I have let those down who follow my posts, and writing.

As I had said on Facebook, I am thankful for some things in my life, even though loss and grief have been troubling me now for a bit. So, I have had to really dig deep into my heart, to find out where the truest of blessings lie, and I have done that.

I am so very thankful that my daughter Amanda, her husband Jimbo and my three Grandkids were able to come up and visit, even though it will be short. I got to see them last night for a couple of hours, and as I hugged my daughter's neck, the tears streamed down my face, and I did not want to let her go. It's been over 2 YEARS since I got to see any of them. They live down by Corpus Christi, which is about 8 hours away or so, and with the boys in school and activities, both of them work now, and my Granddaughter is a Senior this year, they stay very busy. So, it was the best thing I could receive is getting to see them after all this time. I also got to visit with my son, who lives closer, but he also stays busy with a job, and his own activities, so he does not get down as much either.

I am thankful that it "appears" the two thigh abscesses on each thigh, the left one seems to be healed and closed in (hopefully this time it stays that way), and the right one, although not well yet, got a good report from the Wound Care Specialist yesterday. He seemed to think it was beginning to heal, he had to debride it again, which hurts like heck, but it seems to not be infected anymore, and the "collagen" Prisma, is helping to heal it and keep it from getting infected again. So, I am thankful to know that those may finally heal, and be behind me very soon. From there of course, I face surgery, to take out this "motor stalled" pain pump, and put a new one in. I was hoping to have that done the end of next week, BUT, I see the wound care specialist next Thursday, so I am not sure my Pain doctor is going to want to do surgery on Friday. It may be until the following week, which sucks... I really wanted to get it over with BEFORE then, so I can be healed for Christmas. Which is not that huge of a deal, as long as I don't develop a "spinal headache" again. Last time, where the catheter attaches to my spine to put the medication into my spinal fluid, did not seal completely and a tiny hole, can cause a leak in the spinal fluid, thus a spinal headache from hell ensues. And they are horrible. I could not even lift my head from the sofa for 5 days. I drank enough caffeine for an army. I was drinking Caffeine drinks left and right, so it would seal itself over. Thank goodness it worked, and I did not have to go back for surgery, to have a "blood patch" put over the hole. Thank you "Star Bucks".... I got to have as many of those as I wanted for a couple of days!

I am thankful to have my Bub's with me. He and I have a small Thanksgiving feast just for us ready to heat up. I made a small portion of stuffing, of broccoli and rice casserole, of sweet potato casserole, & I had a couple of rolls I bought this week. Plus even though I love home made cranberry salad, we shall settle for it out of the can today. And I had made a strawberry cake with a bit of a twist, it has strawberry preserves in the middle of the layers, and then the frosting is whipped in with cool whip, so it is much lighter. And my daughter brought up some of her incredible pumpkin roll. So, I have a couple of slices of it also for dessert..... nothing fancy, and I am not making a huge bowl of anything... now days I can't eat a whole lot at a time, and Bub's does not need to LOL...

Plus, I "suddenly" had a new person appear in my life in the past couple of days. It was a friend request on Facebook, and I said yes... and wow, talk about someone out of the blue, "fitting" the friendship values, that I do. It was totally shocking, and I certainly was not looking nor expecting it. But, we seem to have a great deal in common, even born the same year... ;)

So, as this year starts to wind into the holidays, and then quickly fall into yet another New Year, I hope and pray things are BETTER, for 2016! It is more than time for some happiness and sunshine to reign down upon my shoulders, and others also....

Plus, as I said on Facebook, I intend on finishing my 3rd book in 2016, even if HELL freezes over....

As the days go by, and nothing else to do..( a line from one of Stevie Nicks songs) - so I have the new boots, the jeans are on their way, now if I can just get the courage up to go out, and get the heck out of this house... I am so sick and tired, of being either here, at Mom's or at the doctor's offices...

Thank goodness I am no longer having to "edit" my own conversations here, and posts. I can say what the heck I please, and if it offends someone, then I guess it does... they can get over it, or not... just saying...

Nothing huge here today, other than a new person, hopefully someone that shall turn into a friend as I said "suddenly appeared" out of the "Blue Clear Sky" as George Strait's songs goes...

Alas an email that made me "feel awesome" about myself for a change... honestly, I thought I had lost all of the "want to" of finding friends again... but that is not true... it is just taking awhile to move past the pain, grief and loss... loss of something I knew for 13 years of my life... and suddenly within a day, it all disappeared... almost as if it never existed... and I STILL DO NOT KNOW WHY??? And I have given up asking... I feel it is futile to "beat a dead horse" as the saying goes...

Living in the realms of "why" is no way to live... why did this person leave? why do I have to do chronically ill? why does everything fall on my shoulders?, why can't life just let up and be a bit easier?... why why, and more why's... and they can haunt you like a love that has all but gone and disappeared... and there is no real answer only questions of the heart remain... tis the story of life and love... you either "fall all in it" and hope that it is forever... or you spend your life totally alone and in misery....

Alas, I prefer NOT to live in misery.... not if I can help it.... So, I bid everyone an incredible holiday weekend, be safe, take care, and always look for that shining star to guide you through even the darkest of nights....

#RABLOG Post WEGO Day 5 - Your Favorite Exercise and How to try to stay in Shape

For a huge many of us, even those without Chronic Illnesses, joint problems, RA, Diabetes, and the list goes on, we DO HAVE problems finding the proper exercise that fits into our "health problems", that gives us enough exercise to get the heart rate up, curb the fat intake, and keep muscles in tone, and help to keep our bones in much better condition also.

I have to admit, all the time I was in Jr. High and High School, I was never one for working out, being in Volleyball, playing Basketball, or playing in Little League. Throughout the most of my younger years up until about the age of 21, I had a weight problem. I was not just hugely obese, but I did have more weight on me, than someone with my build and height.

I also had actually while playing baseball with my friends and cousins at the age of about 14 years old, was used for "2nd base" rather than the base itself. I had a very severe tear of cartilage in my right knee. It got bad enough, that I could not participate in any type of PE classes, and that next Thanksgiving Holiday weekend, when I was about I guess 14 or 15, I was in Baylor Hospital, the children's wing for Orthopedics.

I spent 7 days in the hospital after having a very huge surgery at that time (it meant cutting along the inside of my knee and the scar was about 8 inches or so long. In fact my Dad came and ate Thanksgiving Dinner with me, since everyone was at my Grandparents having a feast, and he dd not want me to be alone. The funny thing was, they brought 2 huge plates with all of the Thanksgiving fixings on them. But, they accidentally left the slices of turkey off of mine... it was so funny! But, that right leg, was in a full cast that as from my toes all the way up to my hip as far as they could get it. I was in that hot thing (thank goodness it was Fall/Winter, for over 3 months! My Orthopedic Surgeon, who did work on the Dallas Cowboys at one time, did an excellent job. They had done a special type of scan the night before, and he feared I may have some type of a tumor in my knee. He was not sure exactly what it was, thus the morning they rolled me into the huge OR, I had been told, I may come out and not have all of my leg left. If it was "cancer" then they would have to remove as much as they could in order for the cancer to not spread.

I came out fine and the "lump" formed due to the damage in my knee. In fact, before the surgery it had gotten so large that my muscles on the side of my knee would "jump" over that lump. So, I spend 3 months at home, no elevator in our old 3 story, plus a basement high school. So, Mom and Dad picked up my books, and lessons, and then turned them in for me each week.

But, that one incident put me on the road of having to be cautious the rest of my life about what type of sports I played in, or anything that I may put a large amount of stress on that knee.

I went ahead to snow ski for several years in my late 200's and early 30's. I became an AVID walker, and walked at least 5 miles a day, 6 days a week, and sometimes 7 days a week. Then as the years past, the lawn work, gardening, even snow skiing had to come to a halt once I was diagnosed with SO MANY joints in bad shape. I had a left elbow and shoulder surgery in my early 30's. I also had the left knee with torn cartilage and had to have surgery on it. Then I had rotater cuff tears, in both shoulders, a couple of times, thus I had arthroscopic surgery on those at least 2 or 3 times each. Then I needed both wrist fixed, both with carpal tunnel, and chose to have the left one done, then so many other things developed, that right wrist was the least of my worries health wise.

This was about the time my PCP after seeing me for months, following all of my joint problems, labs that came back "odd".... he did a total screening for ALL types of autoimmune illnesses. His guess was right on the money. I had RA, Lupus, later came Sjogren's, also Raynauds. I also have Degenerative Joint and Disc Disease which also contributed to more surgeries, than I could even count.

In 2007, if my memory serves me, I had 8 SURGERIES, that one year! Finally ending with both total knee replacements, then after several scopes, I had a complete "reverse" shoulder replacement of my right shoulder. I've had gallbladder issues, and had that removed, and in which complications sent me quickly to Dallas at the Methodist hospital, where I spent 6 WEEKS, and they never really "got" exactly what was wrong, and at the end of my stay, I had a 2nd heart attack, before leaving the hospital.

I've had to have a 4 level cervical spine surgery, replacements and fusions, my hips have been injected with corticosteroids numerous times. I recently had DOUBLE hernia's that required surgery, and in the middle of all of that, I lost ALL of my teeth to Sjogren's. It took over a year to get the bad ones out all the way and then get my dentures in, then wait to have the bottom ones "mini pinned" in.

So, after all of that I am sure you are wondering what the heck does that have to do with my "exercise" program now?

Now, I walk daily. Whether it is outside, around my long driveway, or around the house looking things over and making sure all is okay. I also try my best to do ALL that I can on my own at home. Whether it's vacuuming, doing laundry, cleaning the floors, cooking, cleaning, errands, some light gardening in the cool mornings or late evenings. I have a pedometer that I try to keep up with my "up" times. And I've found, as far as keeping in good shape, physically, mentally and emotionally, just being outdoors, looking at the trees, birds, waving at the neighbors, and so forth those are my ways of staying in shape.



I even cut smaller tree limbs when I can, or put leaves in a pile and use the trash can lid to help scoop them up. As I said, I have learned to "improvise" in many ways, yet the challenge of opening a jar lid, or getting on a chair or stool to put things in the upper pantry, or whatever the task is, if I feel like i can at least do some of those things, the less I feel depressed, I feel even though fatigued, especially if I overdo it, yet it is often a "good type" of tiredness. 

So, whether I am outside trying to clean flower beds, and walk all over my small bit of land in the back, or make 20 or 30 minutes around the driveway, to keep I am less stressed, more energized, and I feel at the end of the day, I have "accomplished" something worth while that day.

                  #RABLOG