I got the drain out this morning, and am going home TOMORROW!!!!! Yet,
as ready as I am to go, it will be so difficult to leave having to go
home, and not have my "family" here in Rehab around me...
you don't
realize how "attached" you become to some people so quickly when you are
in a situation such as this. But, I have Peanut waiting on me, and once
I am settled I will have my new puppy coming home :) So, I am hoping it's not going to bother me as badly going home and Bub's
not there......
Plus I have permission to DRIVE!!!!! I have more
staples from the hematoma removal, and they come out a week from next
Monday. Then if all goes well, I can have my neck surgery in March... so
good news, and some hesitation just knowing I am going from several
people I've gotten close to... will be difficult for the 1st few
days....
they have Home Health coming Monday to the house, and come out
for therapy but my thought is I know enough to do on my own, and I will
be "ready" to just try and get back to my own "normal" rather than
someone coming in and out several days a week...
"Through my heart's work of writing, I share with you my complex journey a top the mountain, sliding down, crawling up, & living through the realms of Autoimmune Arthritic Illnesses. Taming "The Wolf" Thru each Day... One Step at a Time … Together We Are Learning to Survive. Please follow along, to New Beginnings - looking Thru the Window Pane of Pain in life where we shall find our journey leading us to - New Perspectives
Showing posts with label PT. Show all posts
Showing posts with label PT. Show all posts
Friday, January 13, 2017
Thursday, December 29, 2016
How to Move forward with severa Systemic diseases, Lupus, Sjogren's, RA & knowing when everything feels so out of sorts, even with the New Year Upon me....
A piece of me feels as if I am blocking out all that we went through
with Mom, then losing her in June so suddenly. Then the ordeal of
paperwork, and all that happens even after the funeral is over.
Then I've went from one issue such as both ankles severely twisted, to sinusitis, to pneumonia, to Lupus flares, then to take such a horrible fall. and break my right hip in two places... to wind up being in the Rehab on Christmas, and maybe for awhile after the 1st of the year.
I just know that things have to get better. I am so terribly tired of being ill in one way or the other. I tried so hard to NOT allow this to happen to me. I knew my chances of a fall could lead to a break of a bone or joint. That is one of the very last things I wanted r needed. But, when I hit that hardwood floor two weeks ago the coming Tuesday, I knew it was not good.
I wanted to believe that it was bruised badly, yet when I could not drag it on the floor without screaming out in pain, I knew then it was bad.
I've been in a turmoil over the state our nation is in. Now with the "person" that is to be our new President, totally terrifies the hell out of me. I cannot fathom him having enough tact with out own Congress, much less any other nation.
I am having to almost "hide" my feelings this season. Here I see many families, together, excited about kids, Christmas, and this very special time of the year, yet I feel left in a "dark fog" wondering once again why I feel "punished", why did I have to take a fall as I did, and break a hip. And what are the chances that I wind up having another surgery if this hip does not work without an entire replacement since the osteoporosis could cause issues.
Frankly, this is one of the very 1st times I've been this worried about my own health issues. I watched my Grandmother and my Mom be able especially my Grandmother take care of themselves for YEARS alone. Now, I fear everything, from just getting out of the bed to going home. I've always been so bound and determined to do my stuff myself. Now, between the Lupus, the RA, the Osteoporosis, and now a broken hip, that I will lose some of my independence, which that thought bothers me badly.
The latest is I have a huge hematoma where the surgery was done on my hip. I knew it had been looking like a I had "2nd hip" and was sticking out but I just thought it was swelling. But when the nurse went to put a new dressing on it yesterday she found it was much more than swelling, and they took pics of it, and sent them to my doctor. Sure enough it is probably a huge hematoma, and they are putting ice packs on it 4 times daily, and I won't even get the staples out for another week.
My foot still hurts and I still think I have a hairline fracture in it. I guess I should ask for it to be X-Rayed again. I am just so sick of being poked and prodded on, I hate to say that anything hurts.
I have to wonder if anything in my life will ever become "normal" again?
Then I've went from one issue such as both ankles severely twisted, to sinusitis, to pneumonia, to Lupus flares, then to take such a horrible fall. and break my right hip in two places... to wind up being in the Rehab on Christmas, and maybe for awhile after the 1st of the year.
I just know that things have to get better. I am so terribly tired of being ill in one way or the other. I tried so hard to NOT allow this to happen to me. I knew my chances of a fall could lead to a break of a bone or joint. That is one of the very last things I wanted r needed. But, when I hit that hardwood floor two weeks ago the coming Tuesday, I knew it was not good.
I wanted to believe that it was bruised badly, yet when I could not drag it on the floor without screaming out in pain, I knew then it was bad.
I've been in a turmoil over the state our nation is in. Now with the "person" that is to be our new President, totally terrifies the hell out of me. I cannot fathom him having enough tact with out own Congress, much less any other nation.
I am having to almost "hide" my feelings this season. Here I see many families, together, excited about kids, Christmas, and this very special time of the year, yet I feel left in a "dark fog" wondering once again why I feel "punished", why did I have to take a fall as I did, and break a hip. And what are the chances that I wind up having another surgery if this hip does not work without an entire replacement since the osteoporosis could cause issues.
Frankly, this is one of the very 1st times I've been this worried about my own health issues. I watched my Grandmother and my Mom be able especially my Grandmother take care of themselves for YEARS alone. Now, I fear everything, from just getting out of the bed to going home. I've always been so bound and determined to do my stuff myself. Now, between the Lupus, the RA, the Osteoporosis, and now a broken hip, that I will lose some of my independence, which that thought bothers me badly.
The latest is I have a huge hematoma where the surgery was done on my hip. I knew it had been looking like a I had "2nd hip" and was sticking out but I just thought it was swelling. But when the nurse went to put a new dressing on it yesterday she found it was much more than swelling, and they took pics of it, and sent them to my doctor. Sure enough it is probably a huge hematoma, and they are putting ice packs on it 4 times daily, and I won't even get the staples out for another week.
My foot still hurts and I still think I have a hairline fracture in it. I guess I should ask for it to be X-Rayed again. I am just so sick of being poked and prodded on, I hate to say that anything hurts.
I have to wonder if anything in my life will ever become "normal" again?
Thursday, May 5, 2016
Trying to Contend with a Mom with Dementia and my own Body reeking Havoc over me... ( OH and looking into NURSING HOMES)
IT has been another insane WEEK for me! Mom would NOT really participate in any Physical Therapy, basically did not eat for a couple of days, would NOT get up, would not "speak" when I asked her what she wanted to eat, etc.... and FINALLY YESTERDAY, when she realized she HAD NOT TAKEN ANY MEDICATION for a couple of days, and HER BACK WAS HURTING BADLY, and that she needed to try and get up, let the aid give her a shower, change her sheets, finally woke up enough to eat, take her medications and so forth, so I got all of that taken care of, and I have been there every day, and several days I went twice. But, as I told her, when she lays there, and just ignores me after I have asked her about eating and so on, 4, 5, 6 times, and I continue to get no answer, (she is awake and hears me) she chooses to just not answer or she just says NO,
I do not want anything.... I finally give up, tell her I need to get home to do my own house work, and my own things and I leave. Well, I got everything done, and said something to her, and she said, "Well, my daughter" has the same problems.. so once again she had NO CLUE who I was... and this "woman" she keeps talking about coming over is ME! She just does not know anymore most of the time that she is even at her own home, she does not know whether it is spring, summer,fall, winter... she has no clue what day it is, what month it is, refused to go to her heart doctor's appt yesterday, refuses to go see her own doctor, she claims she is not "strong enough" even with a walker to get there...
which NO she is NOT because she stays in the bed most of the time, not moving, not eating, not drinking anything again but diet drinks... and some Ensure... and ALL of us have tried to get her to understand the pain is worse when she continues to not get up, move around, she is weak from laying there, not eating, not taking her medications unless I stand there and force her practically, and it is taking its toll on me in every way.... but I have just had to come to the place this week to realize that is NOT my "MOM" there, but just a "shell" of the person my Mom once was...
her mind, and all is "not my own Mother anymore" and that is very difficult to deal with. I had to forego my neck surgery, which now my lumbar spine is getting worse, and even sitting here is causing my hips and legs to hurt and my feet to go to sleep from the nerve issues. My pain level just as I told her is HORRIBLE BUT I still HAVE TO GET UP, NO MATTER HOW BADLY IT HURTS AND KEEP MOVING! I cannot have the luxury of lying around, and doing "nothing"..... whom else will do it if I don't? Anyway, I "think" the main woman to evaluate her is supposed to be out today, but I have NO CLUE for sure if or when she is coming. So, I am trying to find that out. I am not rushing over there early this morning if no one is coming, because Mom will NOT be up to even know I am there if I go too early..... so continue to keep your prayers and thoughts coming... Love all of you, Rhia
BY THE WAY, I found out, that a "nursing home" can cost as much as 4160.00 A DAY after the 1st 20 days, so that means $12,000.00 a MONTH for someone to be in a nursing home! how Insane is that??????
I do not want anything.... I finally give up, tell her I need to get home to do my own house work, and my own things and I leave. Well, I got everything done, and said something to her, and she said, "Well, my daughter" has the same problems.. so once again she had NO CLUE who I was... and this "woman" she keeps talking about coming over is ME! She just does not know anymore most of the time that she is even at her own home, she does not know whether it is spring, summer,fall, winter... she has no clue what day it is, what month it is, refused to go to her heart doctor's appt yesterday, refuses to go see her own doctor, she claims she is not "strong enough" even with a walker to get there...
which NO she is NOT because she stays in the bed most of the time, not moving, not eating, not drinking anything again but diet drinks... and some Ensure... and ALL of us have tried to get her to understand the pain is worse when she continues to not get up, move around, she is weak from laying there, not eating, not taking her medications unless I stand there and force her practically, and it is taking its toll on me in every way.... but I have just had to come to the place this week to realize that is NOT my "MOM" there, but just a "shell" of the person my Mom once was...
her mind, and all is "not my own Mother anymore" and that is very difficult to deal with. I had to forego my neck surgery, which now my lumbar spine is getting worse, and even sitting here is causing my hips and legs to hurt and my feet to go to sleep from the nerve issues. My pain level just as I told her is HORRIBLE BUT I still HAVE TO GET UP, NO MATTER HOW BADLY IT HURTS AND KEEP MOVING! I cannot have the luxury of lying around, and doing "nothing"..... whom else will do it if I don't? Anyway, I "think" the main woman to evaluate her is supposed to be out today, but I have NO CLUE for sure if or when she is coming. So, I am trying to find that out. I am not rushing over there early this morning if no one is coming, because Mom will NOT be up to even know I am there if I go too early..... so continue to keep your prayers and thoughts coming... Love all of you, Rhia
BY THE WAY, I found out, that a "nursing home" can cost as much as 4160.00 A DAY after the 1st 20 days, so that means $12,000.00 a MONTH for someone to be in a nursing home! how Insane is that??????
Sunday, July 26, 2015
Even though Dealing with Autoimmune diseases, Chronic Illness and/or Chronic Pain, every once in a while it is OKAY to find some humor in life.....
Some of you may recognize this as soon as you see it. If you are a fan of a late night television show, then I am sure you will.
Plus if you were "born" in the era of a certain band, that had a couple of huge hits, you may also recognize this also.
Actually, right now I am in such "blah" (for lack of a better word) mood right now.
I found out that this "lump" on my left top thigh, was NOT just any old lump. I have cellulitis and that is why I have it there. I had been out about 6 weeks ago or so, cutting up some tree limbs, after all of the wind, rains etc... earlier in the spring, and putting them in a trash bin, so they could be gotten rid of. Well, I never really "felt" anything but I must have accidentally brushed my thigh against one of the limbs, and a very tiny piece, just a sliver of "bark" I think must have been just like a "sticker" or splinter and was in my thigh. A couple of days later, I noticed a red spot there, and it was kind of sore, so I was watching it, putting antibiotic cream on it, and keeping it covered. I just thought I scratched my leg doing something, I did not know at the time something was "in it".... but then I did see several days later, it looked like it has a bit of infection in it... just maybe the size of a head of a match, so I cleaned around it, and was able to kind of push around the outside of the place, and I saw this tiny piece of something come out of it. And also there was a tiny bit of yellow, but it was really nothing I considered to be horribly bad. I kept cleaning it, and squeezing around it, and for a couple of days, again, I might get 4 or 5 drops of what may have been a bit of infection out of it. But, then it began to seal itself over, and I no longer seen anything red, or warm, or looked like possibly more infection. So, I went on about my life, and really didn't even think much about it at all.
Then, it must have been about 7 to 10 days later, I was doing something and brushed against my thigh, and I noticed a small "lump" kind of about where that place has healed over. It did not appear like there was infection, not warm, not red, just a small lump under the skin. Well, as the days went by, I began to notice it was getting a bit larger. I still really never gave it that much thought, and in fact I figured with the way my body reacts with my autoimmune issues and illnesses, that it formed kind of a scar tissue under the skin. Yet, I continued to notice, that lump was growing, and when I decided to have it looked at, it was about the size of a silver dollar. It was not "soft", but kind of hard. It is sore to the touch, and as it got larger I noticed it would hurt a bit when I walked. So Friday, after doing some "google" searching, I kind of got concerned. More about the possibility of it being some type of cancer actually. From some of the different searches and sites I went to, all too often I noticed there might be someone who does get a piece of sticker, or glass etc in a foot and so forth, and after that heals suddenly a lump appears and it is cancer.
That is when I put the two and two together, and knew that lump had to be due to the sliver of whatever was in my thigh. OF course I have heard of cellulitis and was more familiar with it, in those with Diabetes. I knew that pretty often due to their sometimes not healing over quickly enough and also being a bit immune compromised, especially their feet and legs if injured can quickly turn into cellulitis, and even worse.
But, I guess my conception of "cellulitis" was more of "seeing a place, red, warm with fever, and opened up, possibly even have infection draining out of it. I did not know that you may have it "underneath" the top layers of skin, like mine, forming a lump of infection, that grows quickly and of course can spread quickly also.
But, once again my "gut feeling" took over, and I felt it was something that needed to be seen ASAP. Even if it were to be a "tumor" it still needed attention and I knew I should not put it off. So, Friday, early right after my PCP's office opened, I called. They are only open a 1/2 day on Fridays, as far as seeing patients, but she must have went back and asked my doctor whether I should come in or if it could wait until next week. So she came back and told me to be there at 11:30 Friday morning. Again, I still was not really considering "infection". The "signs and symptoms" I am aware of about something such as this, is what I said above... red, hot, feverish, possibly broken open, and/or infection that you can "see", would be what I would look for if I suspected infection.
Needless to say, I definitely learned something new in the medical world. I have cellulitis. So, #1, I DID GO and not put it off. If I had that may have landed me in the hospital for IV antibiotics (I am just praying the 2 oral ones I am on gets rid of it all)...both of them very high powered strong medications for infections.
Even though it had "appeared" that the sliver came out, and what bit of infection I got out, did not rid my body of the bacteria underneath the skin. Thus, this lump would have either continued to grow, spread the cellulitis somewhere else in my body, or it sure would have began to grow red, warm, and possibly show outside on top of the skin. It was bad enough I went for that many days without seeing my doctor. But, HE HOPES these two antibiotics will do the trick.
Anyway, one of them Rifampin has to be taken on an empty stomach! Well, you can imagine, I am already of the tendency, to get sick to my stomach, so put that in there, along with the other one Bactrim, and all of my other medications... and I feel like hell honestly. I have read and re-read about both of them, especially "usual" side effects etc.
Of course nausea, upset stomach etc.. is a major one for just about any type of antibiotic. But, I am also very fatigued, in fact as much as I wanted to go to church this morning, I just felt I a not in any shape to go at the moment. I have not slept well again in weeks.... between the stress of my own health problems, and now my Mom's; along with trying to get her to PT 3 times a week, plus she needs an MRI, plus our pain doctor is going to do the Epidural Steroid Injections... (transforminal). They in fact called Friday while I was in the doctors office. I guess they have already gotten the "okay" for the injections from the insurance company, and are ready to set a date up for her to have the injections done. On top of all of that, fortunately, up until about the last year or so, my Mom has been in good health, for her age. She will be 80 next month, and other than controlled high blood pressure, and a "leaky" valve in her heart, that for now they are also controlling with medication, Mom has no clue about any of this and the way they have to do things now. So, when she would go to the doctor, there was none of the extra tests, and so on... she thought she would just go to my pain doctors office, have the injections done the same day, and come home. As I had explained, no doctor that is a legitimate doctor, will put injections into your spine, without a visit to his/her office, having to schedule it with insurance also, and all of the other red tape that now goes along with procedures. So, that has not helped either. I have began to see, that even though I may go over things with her several times, she still may not "get it"... and I find myself explaining things over and over to her, often more than I think I should have to... but I know she is also concerned, been in more pain, that probably she ever had in her life so far, I still get concerned that she maybe a bit more "mixed up" at times than normal.
So, in some ways, I am also concerned about her memory... and even some of the things she tells me about, that happened a very long time ago, and I a JUST think to myself, wow did that happen? And if it did, at my age, why did I not know that years ago. I was around my hometown most of my life, so some of what she brings up and tells me, almost sounds "too odd", strange, "off", to be true in many ways.
Now, onto the REAL REASON for this post, and it seems I ALWAYS have a way of going "full circle" back and forth in order to "say" what I want to in the first place. That is the true "writer" in me for sure...
I am posting this graphic for all of you.... let's see if you recall anything about it! I know for me, I just about ROFLMAO when I hear or see it!
Plus if you were "born" in the era of a certain band, that had a couple of huge hits, you may also recognize this also.
Actually, right now I am in such "blah" (for lack of a better word) mood right now.
I found out that this "lump" on my left top thigh, was NOT just any old lump. I have cellulitis and that is why I have it there. I had been out about 6 weeks ago or so, cutting up some tree limbs, after all of the wind, rains etc... earlier in the spring, and putting them in a trash bin, so they could be gotten rid of. Well, I never really "felt" anything but I must have accidentally brushed my thigh against one of the limbs, and a very tiny piece, just a sliver of "bark" I think must have been just like a "sticker" or splinter and was in my thigh. A couple of days later, I noticed a red spot there, and it was kind of sore, so I was watching it, putting antibiotic cream on it, and keeping it covered. I just thought I scratched my leg doing something, I did not know at the time something was "in it".... but then I did see several days later, it looked like it has a bit of infection in it... just maybe the size of a head of a match, so I cleaned around it, and was able to kind of push around the outside of the place, and I saw this tiny piece of something come out of it. And also there was a tiny bit of yellow, but it was really nothing I considered to be horribly bad. I kept cleaning it, and squeezing around it, and for a couple of days, again, I might get 4 or 5 drops of what may have been a bit of infection out of it. But, then it began to seal itself over, and I no longer seen anything red, or warm, or looked like possibly more infection. So, I went on about my life, and really didn't even think much about it at all.
Then, it must have been about 7 to 10 days later, I was doing something and brushed against my thigh, and I noticed a small "lump" kind of about where that place has healed over. It did not appear like there was infection, not warm, not red, just a small lump under the skin. Well, as the days went by, I began to notice it was getting a bit larger. I still really never gave it that much thought, and in fact I figured with the way my body reacts with my autoimmune issues and illnesses, that it formed kind of a scar tissue under the skin. Yet, I continued to notice, that lump was growing, and when I decided to have it looked at, it was about the size of a silver dollar. It was not "soft", but kind of hard. It is sore to the touch, and as it got larger I noticed it would hurt a bit when I walked. So Friday, after doing some "google" searching, I kind of got concerned. More about the possibility of it being some type of cancer actually. From some of the different searches and sites I went to, all too often I noticed there might be someone who does get a piece of sticker, or glass etc in a foot and so forth, and after that heals suddenly a lump appears and it is cancer.
That is when I put the two and two together, and knew that lump had to be due to the sliver of whatever was in my thigh. OF course I have heard of cellulitis and was more familiar with it, in those with Diabetes. I knew that pretty often due to their sometimes not healing over quickly enough and also being a bit immune compromised, especially their feet and legs if injured can quickly turn into cellulitis, and even worse.
But, I guess my conception of "cellulitis" was more of "seeing a place, red, warm with fever, and opened up, possibly even have infection draining out of it. I did not know that you may have it "underneath" the top layers of skin, like mine, forming a lump of infection, that grows quickly and of course can spread quickly also.
But, once again my "gut feeling" took over, and I felt it was something that needed to be seen ASAP. Even if it were to be a "tumor" it still needed attention and I knew I should not put it off. So, Friday, early right after my PCP's office opened, I called. They are only open a 1/2 day on Fridays, as far as seeing patients, but she must have went back and asked my doctor whether I should come in or if it could wait until next week. So she came back and told me to be there at 11:30 Friday morning. Again, I still was not really considering "infection". The "signs and symptoms" I am aware of about something such as this, is what I said above... red, hot, feverish, possibly broken open, and/or infection that you can "see", would be what I would look for if I suspected infection.
Needless to say, I definitely learned something new in the medical world. I have cellulitis. So, #1, I DID GO and not put it off. If I had that may have landed me in the hospital for IV antibiotics (I am just praying the 2 oral ones I am on gets rid of it all)...both of them very high powered strong medications for infections.
Even though it had "appeared" that the sliver came out, and what bit of infection I got out, did not rid my body of the bacteria underneath the skin. Thus, this lump would have either continued to grow, spread the cellulitis somewhere else in my body, or it sure would have began to grow red, warm, and possibly show outside on top of the skin. It was bad enough I went for that many days without seeing my doctor. But, HE HOPES these two antibiotics will do the trick.
Anyway, one of them Rifampin has to be taken on an empty stomach! Well, you can imagine, I am already of the tendency, to get sick to my stomach, so put that in there, along with the other one Bactrim, and all of my other medications... and I feel like hell honestly. I have read and re-read about both of them, especially "usual" side effects etc.
Of course nausea, upset stomach etc.. is a major one for just about any type of antibiotic. But, I am also very fatigued, in fact as much as I wanted to go to church this morning, I just felt I a not in any shape to go at the moment. I have not slept well again in weeks.... between the stress of my own health problems, and now my Mom's; along with trying to get her to PT 3 times a week, plus she needs an MRI, plus our pain doctor is going to do the Epidural Steroid Injections... (transforminal). They in fact called Friday while I was in the doctors office. I guess they have already gotten the "okay" for the injections from the insurance company, and are ready to set a date up for her to have the injections done. On top of all of that, fortunately, up until about the last year or so, my Mom has been in good health, for her age. She will be 80 next month, and other than controlled high blood pressure, and a "leaky" valve in her heart, that for now they are also controlling with medication, Mom has no clue about any of this and the way they have to do things now. So, when she would go to the doctor, there was none of the extra tests, and so on... she thought she would just go to my pain doctors office, have the injections done the same day, and come home. As I had explained, no doctor that is a legitimate doctor, will put injections into your spine, without a visit to his/her office, having to schedule it with insurance also, and all of the other red tape that now goes along with procedures. So, that has not helped either. I have began to see, that even though I may go over things with her several times, she still may not "get it"... and I find myself explaining things over and over to her, often more than I think I should have to... but I know she is also concerned, been in more pain, that probably she ever had in her life so far, I still get concerned that she maybe a bit more "mixed up" at times than normal.
So, in some ways, I am also concerned about her memory... and even some of the things she tells me about, that happened a very long time ago, and I a JUST think to myself, wow did that happen? And if it did, at my age, why did I not know that years ago. I was around my hometown most of my life, so some of what she brings up and tells me, almost sounds "too odd", strange, "off", to be true in many ways.
Now, onto the REAL REASON for this post, and it seems I ALWAYS have a way of going "full circle" back and forth in order to "say" what I want to in the first place. That is the true "writer" in me for sure...
I am posting this graphic for all of you.... let's see if you recall anything about it! I know for me, I just about ROFLMAO when I hear or see it!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
-
I really have SO MUCH to try & catch up here on, so I am going ton"Post"n some of my ongoing chronic health issues, things abo...
-
How can our kids feel safe when WE as adults don't???? I fear Wal-Mart or just walking across the parking lot at HEB in my small lo...
-
I finally made a trip to Urgent Care with what I feel is a very bad Lupus and RA flare, but there are several "symptoms" strange t...