Every Year so many of us have a "List to Live By"... for the New Year. Some call it a list of "resolutions", "Changes", a new way, a different attitude, motivation for making things different, making what you want in life happen... Whatever you "call" it... we try to set the "tone" for our New Year.
Whether "chronically ill" or not... each of us want things to "change". Now, many of us may be completely satisfied with our life "as is"... but human nature gives us this innate intuition to never stand stagnant, to always want to evolve, to make our mark on the world, or at least our own home and community. As a whole, although when you hear the news it does not sound like it, I still feel "human nature" basically wants to "do well"... to help, to be that change maker...
As I have prodded through these past 7, 8, 9 or more years of chronic illness and chronic pain, I've noticed that it seems for the majority of us that are chronically ill, whether it is an Autoimmune Illness, Heart Disease, Cancer, or any number of diseases, syndromes and/or illnesses "we" as a whole tend to try even harder to "change" what that disease is doing not just to "our bodies and lives" but to all the others we see on a daily basis suffering from the very same illnesses. We tend to be more a part of the "change makers", whether that means a local community awareness, or a National Campaign and being an "Ambassador", Volunteer, Activist, a "voice" such as helping so many of our non-profits, such as The Arthritis Foundation, The Cancer Society, The American Heart Association, Lupus Foundation, The Pain Foundation, and the many, many, charities and organizations that "go to bat" to fight not only locally, in our states, but nationally to make awareness known within our Governmental Bodies, to get finances for more research, the race for a cure, for answers as to "why" some of us suffer so badly from such horrid illnesses, what causes them, how to treat them without destroying a patients life, and how to give people back their quality of daily living!
So, when our chronic illness and/or oain issues bring us to the place we no longer can "work" our jobs, or do many things we once could do, we find ourselves seeking a way to help STOP these diseases from ruining more lives in the future. With the technology, and how we have evolved globally, with a few key strokes, we can contact our state, our county, our city, and our National Government Officials. We can provide all types of very usual assistance without leaving our homes to "make that difference" we so want to make in life. I know some people that probably spend more hours a day now as a volunteer, activist, etc... than they did actually working a 9 to 5 job that nearly killed them... but we can "take off" for a week if we are ill, or work an hour a day, or a few hours a month.... however much "we" want to put into assisting these foundations, is so appreciated. And many of us, like myself have been even honored and rewarded by being sent to Washington DC to stand on Capitol Hill and tell our stories! So, activism, can be and is such a rewarding part of a chronically ill person's life. We feel we are "contributing" even though we may not be able to work hours a day, or leave our homes... we "make a difference"... and not even spend a penny... but give of ourselves and our time... which is definitely valuable... sometimes more than money... the value of "our time"....
I had been looking on Twitter a bit ago, and there was a great idea that I decided to not only to share, but to do. Take an empty jar, and each "good thing" that happens within the New Year, jot it down on a small piece of paper and put it in the jar. Then in the start of the next New Year, get those out and read them. As I said, all too often we "recall" all of the crappy, the bad stuff, that happens within a years time, yet we don't remember those "good moments" and maybe they are "small" but memorable. Then see just how many have filled that jar from that year before. I have already been able to write down 3 or 4 things and put in the jar, and this is the middle of January! Maybe I will need 2 jars to "hold" onto those good moments... those moments that help to make the bad ones seem not so bad.
So, the "title" of this post, is a bit deceiving in some ways. I gave the impression this was going to me more about my own "revelations" for the New Year, and the "tone" of how I "want" my year to be for 2016. I've never been one to set expectations to high, but I do try to give myself "goals" to achieve... yet I have also had to learn that when you have illnesses such as Lupus, RA, Sjogren's.... and so forth... those things you "want to achieve" may get put on the back burner, for those times you are in a "flare", or you are having surgery, or sick, or going to the doctors... there can be all kinds of things that interfere with those "good intentions"... and it is not that you may not achieve them... just not in the time frame you thought you would. I had wanted to be a published author for 20 years plus, and then was with two books within less than a year between them! My 3rd book, has been sitting here mainly completed on my computer, but needing to be put in some type of order now for gosh 3, 4 or more years. But, life and illness... have had to come first... thus the book WILL GET PUBLISHED, but I no longer "pressure" myself... Due to things beyond my control over the last almost 3 years, I began getting it together, then had to leave it... now it will take me weeks to even get back into where I am, what I have in it, and how I want to continue... and I will get there... but I have to feel well enough "physically" to be able to sit at the computer several hours at a time, hopefully with little interruption for weeks, at least 2 or 3... or I will never be able to "delve" into where I am, and where I want to go forward.... so I may not be able to do as much as I want on it, until I have the cervical neck surgery... I can't sit very long at the computer typing right now because of that disc... when it presses down on the nerves, and I have pain in my shoulders and down my arms into my thumbs... it makes it very difficult to "find my voice" to write...
It is different with my blog... I can write a bit, get up, do a few things, and come back to "finish" the post...
But, the "tone" for my 2016 is to try my best to get as far on the 3rd book as I can to prepare for it to be published. I also need to get myself back into "physical shape" and I mean back to walking when it warms up, taking the dogs out walking, and getting out of the house... but I also face at least the one surgery... and maybe two this year... my lower lumbar and sacral spine gives me hell when I try and sit for very long also... and after Friday's ordeal of driving and doctors in Dallas all day long, I have suffered with a great deal of back and side pain... hell I've wondered if I have another kidney stone, the pain has been so bad off and on...
So, the "tone" again is to do as much as I can personally to my home, bless it's heart it needs so much work, and myself... and try to "enjoy" each day whether ill on the sofa, sitting here at the computer writing, or online...walking my pups... walking myself... and hopefully spending several times this year for a day or overnight stay at Winstar! Gosh how I miss that Casino! I walk in and the world melts away, at least for that time you are there...
So, take time to "set your tone" for 2016.... make yourself a "good moments" jar... and in 2017 (when I get to trade in my Prius for a New Model) see how many of those truly make you smile.....
"Through my heart's work of writing, I share with you my complex journey a top the mountain, sliding down, crawling up, & living through the realms of Autoimmune Arthritic Illnesses. Taming "The Wolf" Thru each Day... One Step at a Time … Together We Are Learning to Survive. Please follow along, to New Beginnings - looking Thru the Window Pane of Pain in life where we shall find our journey leading us to - New Perspectives
Showing posts with label New Year 2016. Show all posts
Showing posts with label New Year 2016. Show all posts
Sunday, January 17, 2016
Setting The New Year Tone as I Deal With RA, Lupus, Sjogren's, Trying to Complete a 3rd book, Life, Family and so much more...
Sunday, January 3, 2016
Starting 2016 The New Year Off Right! Lupus, Joint problems, Surgeries, Pain Pump Replacments, Cervical Disc Surgeries, & Seeing the "Positive" Side of a New Year.
Morning Everyone! Well, I must say, I know there are MANY, MANY of us that are GLAD to see 2015 come to a close. Gosh, the number of people that I've came in contact with both on Facebook, and here in my hometown, that have either endured so much loss, or have been extremely ill, in the hospitals, had surgeries, have had major issues with Lupus, RA, Heart problems.... Sjogren's and the list just continues.
I know I face, (now the the 1st one the pain pump replacement surgery is done) at least one surgery. I have to have that cervical disc above where my doctor repaired the others (he is kind of wishy, washy but I think it's probably C-2-C-3.. not sure but am going to look it up. He did an X-ray and saw that I have a disc, at least one, that is 80% "collapsed" which is causing all of the severe neck, shoulder blade, and down my shoulders, into my arms, wrists and even thumbs... pain... at times it is almost unbearable... if I drive even to Dallas about 40 miles or so, it hurts so badly... so I know that has to be dealt with.
Also, the lumbar/sacral disc at L-5 (I think) and S-1, anyway, right at the bottom of my lumbar spine where it begins my sacral spine is also a mess... plus I have some issues with the "opposite" of scoliosis, where my spine tilts "inward" rather than outward... and I've had a "sway back" all my life... so that is certainly not helping but I don't think there is anything they can do about that, but he can fix the disc down there.
Once those things are done, and then I can go to my Rheumatologist, and we re-evaluate all of my medication for RA/Lupus etc... and possibly make some changes then I may begin to see some positive changes for me as far as function of what I can do, and lesser pain, hopefully.
So, even though I "make" A New Years "change things" list... some of it is more those types of things, so I can again have some quality of life...
I also know we must "deal" with my Mom, and all that has been going on with her.... she is much better after the injections into her lumbar spine, which is awesome, but the issues about possibly having "dementia", or worse, ALZ, have to be looked in to...
Other than that, I want to be able to do MORE of my advocacy work, and get back to cross my fingers, eyes and toes, of finishing my book... I've been trying for 2, almost 3 years now, and was on a roll, then between the accident with Jim, the lawsuit, trial, illneses, my teeth and losing those, then Mom being sick, it seems I cannot either find the time, or have enough "energy" to stay and type on it. I have some other things that I had not thought about that I am adding to it. When I was telling one of my high school friends I grew up with about my "home life", when I was young... she told me that I really needed to address those in the book. They in themselves caused me to "think" and do, or not do things throughout my entire life. Nothing that Dad did that was "bad... he was a great Dad, BUT his being over controlling, even when I was in my 30's, and him trying to "help" but he was also trying to place things that he went through during the depression, "on and in my life"... and thus things like me marrying much too young etc... all have had a very prominent effect on how I've lived, and the things I've done, and why I didn't do some of the things I so wanted to do....
I inend on giving YOU, my BLOG READERS much more "facts" and information about "All things Autoimmune"... I hope to really ADD some very important issues, from medications, from how the government effects our lives, about the latest things to get help. hopefully get more people involved in GOOD clinical trials (I know people that have been truly amazed in clinical trials) and work with WEGO, The Arthrhtis Foundation, With the Pain Foundations, plus others such as the Lupus, Sjogren's, RA... and more things that can help YOU as patients, caretaker's. family, friends.... to understand the way these illnesses effect each and every part of a life, from physical, mental, emotional, spiritual... and why "we" do or do not do, things.... due to often "invisible" illnesses and pain....
One for instance, I had "major surgery" last Monday. I had my pain pump that "stalled" replaced. I am really not supposed to be doing much of anything, BUT I am by myself for now, so there are things I must take care of... and can't wait... So, I had not been to the market in a week, and needed a few things... NO, I was NOT feeling the best, but I got dressed, "forwent" the makeup, and went to the market. Well, I was not "moaning" in pain, or even acting as if I had "surgery"... the only things I did do, is ask the guy bagging my stuff to keep my "bags" light this time, because I was not supposed to life anything over 5 pounds, and was not supposed to use my arms over my head... well there are MANY things a person needs to get, reach, etc... and it calls for putting your arms over your head..
Of course I got home, and I was "good" I did bring in one bag at a time, rather than grabbing several, as usual... and tried NOT to do anything he told me NOT to do... yet, people around me in the market, unless I "told" them would have never known I had "surgery" or that I was in pain..... we sometimes "hurt" and it shows.. but we also have learned to "suck it up" at times, and try to not let that type of thing effect our lives... I don't want to think someone feel "sorry" for me... etc....
Okay, well I need to get some other things done, but I wanted to "catch up" as to what 2016 shall mean HERE, and what I plan to try and do to HELP MY READERS!
Wishing YOU and YOURS a blessed, healthy, peaceful, calm, faith filled, renewed hope and love for 2016!
Rhia
I know I face, (now the the 1st one the pain pump replacement surgery is done) at least one surgery. I have to have that cervical disc above where my doctor repaired the others (he is kind of wishy, washy but I think it's probably C-2-C-3.. not sure but am going to look it up. He did an X-ray and saw that I have a disc, at least one, that is 80% "collapsed" which is causing all of the severe neck, shoulder blade, and down my shoulders, into my arms, wrists and even thumbs... pain... at times it is almost unbearable... if I drive even to Dallas about 40 miles or so, it hurts so badly... so I know that has to be dealt with.
Also, the lumbar/sacral disc at L-5 (I think) and S-1, anyway, right at the bottom of my lumbar spine where it begins my sacral spine is also a mess... plus I have some issues with the "opposite" of scoliosis, where my spine tilts "inward" rather than outward... and I've had a "sway back" all my life... so that is certainly not helping but I don't think there is anything they can do about that, but he can fix the disc down there.
Once those things are done, and then I can go to my Rheumatologist, and we re-evaluate all of my medication for RA/Lupus etc... and possibly make some changes then I may begin to see some positive changes for me as far as function of what I can do, and lesser pain, hopefully.
So, even though I "make" A New Years "change things" list... some of it is more those types of things, so I can again have some quality of life...
I also know we must "deal" with my Mom, and all that has been going on with her.... she is much better after the injections into her lumbar spine, which is awesome, but the issues about possibly having "dementia", or worse, ALZ, have to be looked in to...
Other than that, I want to be able to do MORE of my advocacy work, and get back to cross my fingers, eyes and toes, of finishing my book... I've been trying for 2, almost 3 years now, and was on a roll, then between the accident with Jim, the lawsuit, trial, illneses, my teeth and losing those, then Mom being sick, it seems I cannot either find the time, or have enough "energy" to stay and type on it. I have some other things that I had not thought about that I am adding to it. When I was telling one of my high school friends I grew up with about my "home life", when I was young... she told me that I really needed to address those in the book. They in themselves caused me to "think" and do, or not do things throughout my entire life. Nothing that Dad did that was "bad... he was a great Dad, BUT his being over controlling, even when I was in my 30's, and him trying to "help" but he was also trying to place things that he went through during the depression, "on and in my life"... and thus things like me marrying much too young etc... all have had a very prominent effect on how I've lived, and the things I've done, and why I didn't do some of the things I so wanted to do....
I inend on giving YOU, my BLOG READERS much more "facts" and information about "All things Autoimmune"... I hope to really ADD some very important issues, from medications, from how the government effects our lives, about the latest things to get help. hopefully get more people involved in GOOD clinical trials (I know people that have been truly amazed in clinical trials) and work with WEGO, The Arthrhtis Foundation, With the Pain Foundations, plus others such as the Lupus, Sjogren's, RA... and more things that can help YOU as patients, caretaker's. family, friends.... to understand the way these illnesses effect each and every part of a life, from physical, mental, emotional, spiritual... and why "we" do or do not do, things.... due to often "invisible" illnesses and pain....
One for instance, I had "major surgery" last Monday. I had my pain pump that "stalled" replaced. I am really not supposed to be doing much of anything, BUT I am by myself for now, so there are things I must take care of... and can't wait... So, I had not been to the market in a week, and needed a few things... NO, I was NOT feeling the best, but I got dressed, "forwent" the makeup, and went to the market. Well, I was not "moaning" in pain, or even acting as if I had "surgery"... the only things I did do, is ask the guy bagging my stuff to keep my "bags" light this time, because I was not supposed to life anything over 5 pounds, and was not supposed to use my arms over my head... well there are MANY things a person needs to get, reach, etc... and it calls for putting your arms over your head..
Of course I got home, and I was "good" I did bring in one bag at a time, rather than grabbing several, as usual... and tried NOT to do anything he told me NOT to do... yet, people around me in the market, unless I "told" them would have never known I had "surgery" or that I was in pain..... we sometimes "hurt" and it shows.. but we also have learned to "suck it up" at times, and try to not let that type of thing effect our lives... I don't want to think someone feel "sorry" for me... etc....
Okay, well I need to get some other things done, but I wanted to "catch up" as to what 2016 shall mean HERE, and what I plan to try and do to HELP MY READERS!
Wishing YOU and YOURS a blessed, healthy, peaceful, calm, faith filled, renewed hope and love for 2016!
Rhia
Friday, December 25, 2015
Friday, December 18, 2015
Life, Pain, Lots of "Stuff" and living with "what we are given".....
Got Mom through the lumbar ESI injections early this morning in Dallas.... 3 different places, and hoping her back pain improves... our Pain Specialist seems to think they will help a good deal...
My "surgery" for the new pain pump (replacement) is on December 29th!!! One heck of a way to end 2015...
My severe pain, in my shoulder blades, down in my elbows, and even into my wrists and thumbs, NOT my other surgeries, thank goodness... BUT, I need another cervical neck disc replacement... I believe he said C-4 ?? is 80% COLLAPSED and has to be fixed...
Good news, the abscesses, one gone all the way, the other about 90% closed also... :)
Bad news the pain is horrible... and I still need the lumbar/sacral back surgery also... ALL of course postponed for at least 4 months now due to the cellulitis/abscesses on both top thighs....
Got the puppy, got his 2nd boosters... and got my hair cut, that was yesterday! I love it, or I will in about a week, once it grows out just a tiny bit... then it is really better, than when 1st cut... and it is SHORT!
Holidays, well suck... my kids will be not around... busy, plus my daughter 8 hours away or so...
And I've had an EXTREMELY ROUGH WEEK, EMOTIONALLY... I AM SURE DUE TO MANY THINGS, AND THE HOLIDAYS, after losing my Tazzy who was an Xmas present 12 or so years ago... plus Jim not here and in Seattle...
Just so much going on, and by the time I "think" I may have time to write or do something else different, something else happens, like I had to put a new flapper in Mom's toliet this week, in among everything else....
Seen some awesome Christmas Movies, I love Hallmark Channel... and other movies as well... the "Coat of Many Colors" about Dolly Parton's young years, was amazing!
So, here is a new pic of me....
Happy Holidays to All - May we have Peace, Comfort, Joy, Hope and Faith throughout the rest of 2015 and into 2016 - to Eternity!
My "surgery" for the new pain pump (replacement) is on December 29th!!! One heck of a way to end 2015...
My severe pain, in my shoulder blades, down in my elbows, and even into my wrists and thumbs, NOT my other surgeries, thank goodness... BUT, I need another cervical neck disc replacement... I believe he said C-4 ?? is 80% COLLAPSED and has to be fixed...
Good news, the abscesses, one gone all the way, the other about 90% closed also... :)
Bad news the pain is horrible... and I still need the lumbar/sacral back surgery also... ALL of course postponed for at least 4 months now due to the cellulitis/abscesses on both top thighs....
Got the puppy, got his 2nd boosters... and got my hair cut, that was yesterday! I love it, or I will in about a week, once it grows out just a tiny bit... then it is really better, than when 1st cut... and it is SHORT!
Holidays, well suck... my kids will be not around... busy, plus my daughter 8 hours away or so...
And I've had an EXTREMELY ROUGH WEEK, EMOTIONALLY... I AM SURE DUE TO MANY THINGS, AND THE HOLIDAYS, after losing my Tazzy who was an Xmas present 12 or so years ago... plus Jim not here and in Seattle...
Just so much going on, and by the time I "think" I may have time to write or do something else different, something else happens, like I had to put a new flapper in Mom's toliet this week, in among everything else....
Seen some awesome Christmas Movies, I love Hallmark Channel... and other movies as well... the "Coat of Many Colors" about Dolly Parton's young years, was amazing!
So, here is a new pic of me....
Happy Holidays to All - May we have Peace, Comfort, Joy, Hope and Faith throughout the rest of 2015 and into 2016 - to Eternity!
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