WEGO Health Awards Judging, Chronic Illnesses, Pain & The Brave People That Find the Strength and Courage to Talk, Blog & Write about it

As I worked on my WEGO Judging over the past couple of weeks, I've found that there are some incredibly strong women (and men) out there living their lives everyday, with one, two, three and more chronic illnesses, syndrome, and pain. They have also been through the HELL of hospitalizations that lasted for months, endless surgeries, transfusions, being not even able to eat and being fed through an IV (as I did in 2010), and some of them like myself, at that time the doctors really DID NOT KNOW what was wrong with me. My own PCP has made the statement since then on several occasions that he was extremely concerned back then I was going to die. Endless numbers of specialists came to see me... most of them were of a foreign decent, and frankly I could not understand what they were saying to me. Many of them at the time, didn't really know what the hell "Lupus" was. They blamed some of my illness on the Lupus, yet, they also were treating me for what they told us later was a "collapsed" bile duct. It was literally leaking poison into my abdominal cavity, rather than it going out of my system and being filtered out by my intestines, and out as it should. I had several "tubes" running outside of my right side. Later I had to even come home with them still in place, and we had to watch the fluid that came out into the bag, to make sure it was becoming more "clear" and not bloody etc. I went through that for several weeks. For at least 6 weeks I never put a drop of food or anything to drink in my mouth. There was a huge bag of "nutrients" that was white, and I was told it was a certain concoction mixed up by the pharmacy for me. I went through nights that I barely knew where I was. In fact, I spent mt 50th birthday having yet another surgery. Jim, my son, and my Mom were there because they had told me to "call my family" in, "just in case".... "Just in Case"???? I had at least 8 or 9 other IV bags hanging and pouring into me, pain medications that I watched the clock for and begged each moment I knew I could have more.... I really have never "told" this entire story, from start to finish, here or on my blog. I have put bits and pieces about it over the years on both, as well as it will be in my book. It took my system weeks to even be able to withstand a regular sip of "Coca-Cola in it. It would put my entire stomach and intestines into a "tailspin" and the next thing I knew nurses had to come in and change my entire bed, put me into the shower (dammit they never warmed it up enough and this was the middle of February and one of the coldest Winters in TX since I had been back).... any thing that was "food" "stunk" to me. Jim would go and try to find something I could stand to even remotely put into my stomach, and even certain kinds of bread smelled so bad to me there was no way I could take even a bite. Why I am telling this now here, I am not sure. Probably due to one of the blogs I read over the past few days, and her own battle with what later was diagnosed properly as Crohn's. But, more than that, it seems each year that February rolls around, which my Dad's birthday was on the 2nd, Ground hogs day, and mine of course just passed on the 15th, almost a Valentine Baby.. and it brings all of those weeks and weeks, and honestly months back into my memory. How ill I really was, and how it truly it is a miracle I am here today to type about this.... so ALL of you... everyone of you that have the stamina, bravery, the "guts" (no pun intended), the wear with all, strength... and many more descriptive words to say how incredible you are to tell "your" story. Whether it be autoimmune in nature, arthritic, FM, MS, and all of the other Chronic Illness and Pain so many of us endure... so WE can go out and tell others "it is okay"... you are still you.... you are not "less than", that life can be full, and fun... you just have to sometimes decide upon a "new kind of normal"... that is what I have to do, and even now... "normal" can change at any given time... I am THANKFUL, to be here this morning and able to tell a portion of my story... and I am thankful for my family, my spouse, kids and Mom, that support and love me, even though I feel like I disappoint them at times... and my true friends here that also love me for me... sick, well, mad, depressed, happy, or whatever I maybe at that moment, those out there know I mean you... that support and love me unconditionally, with Lupus, with Sjogren's, now with dentures and not my teeth, with the joints replaced, and the pain pump hanging from my right side... I am still "me"... and I feel blessed.... thank all of you for accepting me no matter whether brain fog hits, or I find myself on the sofa for the day, or I am up cleaning and doing "normal" things.... I am blessed.

Anticipating the 2015 Arthritis Foundation Annual "Summit on the Hill"!

A dear friend of mine that I met in fact at last years Annual Summit on the Hill by the Arthritis Foundation had posted and asked me if I had filled out my "Travel Award". Well, yes I have, and as I told her, I had made "Platinum Ambassador" thus I believed it was my "obligation" to come to the Summit. Of course I would try to go whether I had made that or not. My entire world evolved around that Summit last year in March. I had in fact "won" a Travel Award, after putting my application in at the very last moment. I felt I had probably missed out since I was so late in even knowing about being able to go by getting a "Travel Award". So, by the time I filled out my paperwork and emailed it in, I feared I would be too late. But, within a few days, I received a "glowing email" that I had in fact been granted a Travel Award to D.C. for the Summit that took place and does take place each year around the 24th through about the 26th of March. I will never forget how much I got out of the Summit even being my very first time there, and just how much more I wanted to be a "better voice"... activist, advocate, blogger, writer, and then I wanted of course to be an Ambassador for the AF. I was not sure I would be able to get enough advocacy work in to make "Platinum" especially after my husbands accident, but I was SURE I would give it all I could in between everything that took place for those months following that fateful day in March. I've played it over and over in my mind. I have spoken about it numerous times online, and in person. I've written about it, blogged about it, and still to this day, at times it feels almost surreal.
It is almost impossible to believe all that happened at that time did. What is more impossible to believe is that the entire ordeal with the wreck that Jim went through, the months of hospital and rehab after that, and then months of outpatient rehab, the red tape that still goes on and on with the lawyer, and all of the fighting we have done to get him into physicians etc... it is truly a night mare. Maybe that is truly why I have night terrors almost every night of my life. There are not many nights that I don't wake up and I cannot breathe. I am "suffocating" in one way or the other in the night terror, but I am also in real life having massive problems breathing. Most nights I am up, trying half asleep, half awake and still almost in a dream like state trying to find my inhaler and the nasal spray, so I can once again breathe. It is crazy insane, but it is so very, very true.

I've done a good bit of research on night terrors, and of course the amount of stress from the accident in itself is enough to send me into a frenzy. When you add in my own health problems, and the fact that I have had to endure a great deal of my own pain once again, and the entire situation with my teeth, or no teeth now, the full set of dentures... of which the bottoms STILL will NOT stay in place, thus I am still not eating as I should, and by the end of the day, I just want to take the damned things out and throw them across the lawn into the street and say to hell with all of it. Of course the issue of also having "complications" which for me, what is new, yet they always seem to surprise me... of which involves my sinus cavity on the right side... and it is the maxillary sinus passage, which I have already been told, that I need to have repaired, I am sure has sometimes a great deal of reasoning behind my night mare like breathing problems. But, when you are facing another 7,000.00 PLUS out of pocket since you can't get a damned dental plan worth a flip, OR as this should be paid by regular Health Insurance, because a "chronic HEALTH Illness" is what caused me to lose my teeth in the first place should pay a portion of it. But, I have fought "tooth and nail" (no pun intended)... and I have just gotten way too weary to fight them anymore about paying any of it. Of course now, I changed insurance on January 1, thus you can believe that makes it entirely impossible to get either one of them to pay a dime ....

There is "after the fact of me already being out thousands" a "non-profit" that is for dental issues, mainly caused from autoimmune illnesses or cancer patients. But, there are way too many people needing the help versus the dentists and oral surgeons that will try and help out of generosity and not expecting either to have lots of people that will help.

Baylor dental college in Dallas also has certain things students do, while the professors and doctors watch, but you will much pay like 278.00 just to walk in the door. Then the 78.00 is a "fee" non-refundable, and the 200.00 is to apply towards care you are given, or if they can't help you then you get the 200.00 back. I know I went there to have my 4 wisdom teeth cut out all at once. In fact I was newly married, and my Dad drove me up there and home. I looked like a chipmunk with a full mouth of acorns for over a week. But, they charged a great deal less that having that done in a regular oral surgeons office.

As I leave behind so much "sadness" and "darkness" from 2014, I am trying my best to hold onto 2015 being a positive year, full of prosperity, not just financially, but more in the "domain" if you will, of getting things accomplished. I am trying to stay as far away as I can of thinking about all that took place in 2014, trying to look as each day a new one, that can mean much more as far as my writing, my advocacy, my activism, not only online, through my blog and writing, but I hope to be more involved in trying to find a way for my entire community of Ennis and Ellis County to become knowledgeable about the Autoimmune Illnesses, their symptoms, their lack of being able to be diagnosed, and to educate those that are surrounding me day in and day out right here, even as next door neighbors. I've come to see as of late, that there are MANY people that have some type of AI disease, FM, CFS/ME, Chronic Pain, right here that I could help, if given some assistance on how to go about starting an "awareness campaign" locally. We are SO LACKING in the understanding of Lupus, RA, Sjogren's (boy this one we REALLY NEED some understanding on), and MS... Raynaud's, Diabetes 2, autoimmune arthritis, autoimmune psoriatic arthritis... and the list goes on and on.

In fact, just about the time I was finally "diagnosed" with first MTCD & UCTD.. that turned into RA, Lupus, and the Sjogren's and Raynaud's was showing immediately when the MCTD first became the "name" of what was going on with me. There were two gentlemen (which is rare in the first place for men to have AI illnesses) both of them around the same age, both going to the church we were going to at that time, and both had Grave's Disease. What makes it even more unusual is men for the most part don't have "thyroid" issues either. Usually women have more of a propensity to have any or all of these illnesses and disorders.

So, right there being in a Church, with two guys, both almost the same age, both having Grave's disease was enough for me to absolutely know we had a much larger group of people with autoimmune illnesses. Both of then underwent treatment and both were "cured"... put into remission. My understanding is that once Grave's disease is in remission, that is permanent. Unlike many of the other AI illnesses, they "can" go into remission, but more than likely you will undergo swings of "active" disease symptoms, and then inactivity, yet there are no real "cures" for any of them.

That is why for me, I really would like to find a way, with the help of some of our community leaders, to get a group, or some type of monthly, weekly, however... crowd in a "face to face" type of environment to help them further their knowledge about their own, friends, or loved ones AI illnesses. I also would love to help people and physicians in "learning" how to talk about these diseases, along with how to talk about medications, side effects, long term "goals" or what to expect from having an AI or more than one, and what that will do in the years to come. Will more medication be needed, will hopefully there be more research, and possibly medications coming out? All of the questions that either patients themselves feel it is "wrong" to ask, or for the doctors who honestly are not as well versed on these illnesses, and how they address them to their patients. This includes all medical staff. From the person who answers the phone, to the nurses, lab techs, doctors, and other staff ALL of them need to be very well versed in these dreadful illnesses. For one thing, you maybe "well" and feel fit as a fiddle one moment, and within hours be severely ill and need hospitalization. Often times there is not a "warning" of impending AI and their flares. They can come on within moments, and you don't even know what hit you until it has. Unlike the flu, a cold, and other illnesses where you can certain "symptoms" like a forewarning of being ill, AI's can "attack" at any time they please.

So, when I call my PCP, and the girl that answers the phone is either not aware of my patient status OR she may not know about a "flare" of Lupus... she may insist that I "come in" and be seen. Well, sometimes that is a necessary... but at times, depending on my symptoms, my doctor may allow me to fore go the trip to the office for a visit, and just come in for a corticosteroid injection and a script for a high dose tapering down 14 days round of Prednisone.

Well, as I said, if the woman that answers that phone is "new", and so forth, I may have to make an uncalled for trip to sit in that office, to get the exact same thing I asked for. So, I've exposed myself to other illnesses, especially in the Winter. I've also wasted the doctors time, my time, and caused some other patient who truly may need to have been seen, to wait for a day. So, it is truly unjust for everyone. But, if whom answers the phone either knows me well enough, OR they understand the workings of come of these diseases, he or she may already be on top writing a note, taking down the information so they can talk to the doctor BEFORE making me come in for a totally uncalled for trip.

So, there are many involved in all types of health care that should be very "up" on autoimmune illnesses, diseases, symptoms, medications, and all that wrapping them up in neat newspaper, with a bow around it.

The very latest of challenges that many of us have had to hop over, or will trail and error finally get something nailed into the heads of the medical professionals, far and wide.

Interestingly enough, the UK tends to be "up" on the latest and greatest when it comes to being the leader in new medications, clinical trials, and finding out more than just about anyone around the globe. Often times I've noticed that Britain may have a "pilot" medication in the works. As soon as it is approved by the Brit's, you can bet the USA will be setting for us to jump up, and get to scrambling together researchers, grants and funding, clinical trials, and all on the band wago. What happens often times with a situation such as that. If the "CDC" of Britain signs off on a new medication, it means that the "medication" we put into the hands of researchers here that is basically the same, may not have to cost as much and those types of medications and treatments are sometimes able to be "fast tracked" into production. So, that is great for our economy, great for the Pharmaceutical companies, patients, doctors and so forth, because it gets here, and gets the door, helping to ultimately save lives...which ALL are great events when it comes to those with chronic autoimmune, incurable. painful, night mare diseases.

As 2015 "rolls in", I am hoping it allows me to try and "roll on through" with this blog, with the Ambassador (Platinum) work, and all of the other activist activities I so want to participate in.

Wish me luck as I am preparing to once again try to write the "Ultimate Book"... and get it published. I am also working on the more "fun" book, that will include many of the TX "sayings"... different words and how they tend to have different meanings in the South and in TX.. and many of the what some might call "odd" traditions we engage in here... in the Lone Star State!

Working on a back ground graphic for the top of my Facebook page. I want to include the URL back to here. Often people may not bookmark a page, or like even though I post a "link" back to my blog in the posts, it may get moved down several slots, and then people may not be aware of how to get back to my blog...

PLEASE Start COMMENTING!!!!

I have lots to catch you up on over the next couple of weeks. I promise I will. I am on a new RA/Lupus medication, that is not a biologic. I will explain what my Rheumatologist told me, and how he has come to the conclusion, that if I can, maybe trying to stay away from a biologic, other than trying Orencia, would help to possibly reduce the number of infections I continue to get. I had been ill from way before Christmas last year, and was ill when I went to D.C. at the end of March! I was having a flare, but I was also I believe even then developing bronchitis that turned into double pneumonia. But, until I was running 104.5 degree temperature and almost out of my mind hallucinating from the high fever (I NEVER have a fever)... thus now I certainly know what to look for if I expect I might be having a new infection coming along.

I am so grateful to ALL of you who come here and read my blog posts. I know you do, and I see who comments and who does not. I will say that up until the last couple of weeks, there was not a good way I could see the comment if there was one, and I certainly had not a good way to see who commented at all, and what they said.

Now Blogger has made some much needed revisions in the Blogger software, and I just have to catch up as to what they have changed, and how I can use what they have done to make my blog even much, much better.

We have a few more things to work out with doctors, finding a "good" pain specialist for Jim and a Neurologist who will take his insurance and take care of problems as they arise. We think we may FINALLY have a couple of good referrals, but we shall see. When it comes to doctors, tests, hospitals, insurance companies, and pharmacies, you never know what the outcome will be.

I am still working on getting my jawbones strong and well enough to withstand the little mini implants that my dentures will snap down on those and be able to let me eat with them in and they not especially the bottom one coming falling out, I am getting there, but it is just taking patience to allow those all to fill in and heal before he can put those implants in and they stay strong enough, and my jawbone strong enough to hold them in. So, I still have at least until November to do X-rays and see where we stand.

I have just completed being a "Consumer Reviewer" that I had been nominated to do and then was asked if I wanted to do it, and of course I said yes. It was a true learning experience but it has provided me with lots of new avenues of advocacy, ambassador, and activist can mean, and how much my opinion and all of our opinions Do MATTER!!!!

On Monday, Jim's birthday.... the 22nd we have an appointment at our lawyers office to go over what will be going on for the depositions. Then on Tuesday we go back in and give our depositions.  Since it is in Ft. Worth, our plans are to stay the night, and possibly go out to eat or something in celebration of Jim's birthday... and who knows... we maybe also celebrating the nightmare of this wreck stuff to finally be coming close to an end... and it coming out in our favor in a very huge way!!!

It is a bit nerve racking, thus I have not talked about it much. I just felt until we are close enough to possibly know when we will know the outcome. So keep us in your thoughts and prayers, as Monday and Tuesday are very significant for us in regard to possibly getting favorable results from the law suit.

I shall put on more tomorrow... as I get some of my other
chores out of my face...


Hugs, Rhia and by the way.. once and again, thank you my dear friend for taking a moment to post here :)                                                                              

Just a Quick Post and I will promise to post more tomorrow....

I've been going back and forth over my "eye" stuff. The double Vision. It has progressed and gotten much worse. Sometimes even now, with my glasses on, it rears its ugly head.

Since everything has happened as it has I already missed my Rituxan infusion and have to reschedule it, my new dentist who also works out of the same facility SW Med, in Dallas, and I am in desperate need of both of those. Plus I feel i may need to see the eye specialist again but I am not sure there is anything else to be done about it,,

I've narrowed the entire issue down to two "diagnosis"
First of all "retinal vasculitis" and moreover all of it definitely lines up as symptoms of Myasthenia Gravis. In fact "MS" and also Myasthenia Gravis came up at one of the last Neurologists I went to. He said it is also difficult to really "diagnose", due to like many of the other autoimmune diseases, there is no "one" test that tells them yes or no. There are a couple of blood tests out there, but just like RA, Lupus and the rest of them... they could be "serum negative" but you have it or be "serum positive" and not.... thus counting on tests right now is usually nuts...

But, my symptoms just tell the story and map out each and every way the symptoms go... so I am including a couple of articles about these, and I plan on doing more research myself. If any of you find something or come across some good information I would so appreciate it if you would post links here etc...

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/11257479

http://www.aao.org/publications/eyenet/200607/neuro.cfm

There are lots of good links out there with information so if you fall upon anything that mentions this, as well as anything that might help with Jim's recovery from the accident and trying to learn to walk again... any and all is so needed and appreciated..... Rhia

Some of My Posts are worth "Repeating"...

As I went through Facebook this morning to read any new posts there, I found that one of my dear friends went to see her Rheumatologist yesterday. The prognosis was that her RA is worsening and is affecting her vision due to inflammation. So, she is headed for an opthamologist. I know that I had told my "horror story" over the "Neuro-opthamologist before here, but since I decided to tell the story there again for many that may not have seen it when it all took place, I also thought it was very "well worth" repeating again. The LONG of it, and it is long. That is the ONLY way I know to write about it. Start from the beginning about the double vision, since that sent me to an eye doctor in the first place to now when I am still waiting to hear from the Medical Board about how that doctor was "punished" if at all. So, below is how I told it this morning (very early) on FB. I still, even while I wrote it out again this A.M., find it almost too ridiculous to believe! I have had my "rounds" with doctors in the past, but nothing like what happened early that morning at one of the hospitals in Dallas in the operating room I was in.

My post from FB:
 It is wonderful to have a great rheumatologist that helps like that. Mine is an angel from heaven also. I one began to "see double". I first noticed it while watching television one evening. I would "see" the real car in the movie, then right behind and a bit upward I saw "another" car duplicate. It scared me so badly. I am on Plaquenil so I have to see an Opthalmologist annually. It began to get worse, and I would notice it then outside during the daytime. I went to my regular Opthalmologist, and thy put a "sphere" in my glasses. But, they sent me to a Neuro-Opthalmologist. There are only like 3 in the state of TX! Two happened to be in Dallas. The first one is a great doctor but his "bedside" manner was like a BRICK! Worse than that. He saw me like three times and told me NOTHING! He barely even looked at me, all of his 50 "staff" members seemed to do all of the exams. He decided since my "inflammatory" levels in mu labs were up, I may have Temporal Arteritis, which meant LARGE doses of predisone for like 2 YEARS! I mean something like 40 mg daily, which means my osteoporosis (mine is already SEVERE) would just get worse if that is even possible, I would puff out like a balloon (I already gain weight when I have to take the 14 day step down of it with a flare), my skin is already paper thin, my teeth are already having to be pulled out and decaying like crazy, I already bruise extremely extremely easily and I STAY bruised in some places forever, & so on. Every "bad" thing prednisone does I already more than likely have. As my PCP calls is the corticosteroids are a "necessary evil" for many of us. Needles to say, this guy did a "temporal artery biopsy". He never told me "how all that happens, what he would do etc." I had to look it up and then I even questioned my PCP again and asked him if he thought it necessary. Since I was already on a daily small dose of prednisone, even IF I had the Giant Cell Temporal Arteritis", it probably would not show on the biopsy anyway. So, I had it and that is another entire nightmare story! Basically, I had to file a complaint to the Texas Medical Board. He "blew up" at the nurse that was with me in the surgery room, while I was just waking up barely from the procedure. It was so BAD (I was STILL on the operating table!!) that the Anesthesiologist stayed with me to make sure nothing happened to me. Plus there were about 20 other employees standing where all of this took place, as he continued to YELL, CURSE AND SCREAM AT THE NURSE!!! They were standing at the ONLY DOOR OUT, thus I was there for the entire thing. They even called security on him. It is insanity to say the least. It finally got stopped (this went on for more than 5 minutes for sure), and I was taken by the guy who put me to sleep and two more nurses back to outpatient surgery. Boy, they were questioning me to make sure I was okay etc... but when they wheeled me back to outpatient we went RIGHT BY the doctor and he never said ONE WORD!!! To this day he has not apologized or nothing. I NEVER went back, but to see him for the biopsy results which were "negative" anyway. Even that last appointment he never said a word, gave an apology, nothing... but between my call to the hospital, and their calls to me, and reports sent on him to Medicare.. I filed a formal complaint with the Medical Board. My complaint was legit... in fact he went trial over it about mid October, and I know from another letter from the Medical Board, he is still even more under investigation and they are decided just how badly to punish him. The nurse really DID nothing "wrong" from what I was told.. she "opened" one of the sterol instruments in a way that did not "suit" him, so that is what the whole ordeal was about... I know this sounds like something from a horror movie, but this is the ENTIRE TRUTH! Talk about nuts! I was told my by Rheumatologist he used to be a doctor at the teaching hospital where my Rheumy is and they "got rid" of him due to his "temper". Okay after ALL OF THAT (sorry I got side tracked but I tell the story because PEOPLE need to know DOCTORS are not all SAINTS, and they don't know everything... go with your "GUT" feeling... if they don't suit you, find someone else.... So, I go to the only other eye specialist in TX that is close, and it takes like 3 months to get into see him. After all of this, he said it was my "Lupus" causing the double vision. He or "any" of them are sure why ( I STILL think I have a mild case of MS myself & my Rheumy basically agreed with me) so he prescribed an even different type of specialized "sphere" in my glasses so while I have them ON, I do not have double vision. But, without them on I STILL HAVE DOUBLE VISION!!!! Even through this, I went to 3 Neurologists and they could not really say if I have MS, or one seemed to think I have Myasthenia Gravis. Go figure! Which it is ALSO AN AUTOIMMUNE DISEASE! Okay after all of that rambling TIFFANY, definitely find you an Opthamologist that you feel good about. Go with your "gut" feelings about all of it I suggest. Not just the eye specialist, but now with the RA worsening, you may begin (I HOPE NOT) other symptoms... As you already know (OF COURSE) do your HOMEWORK! I know that sounds silly me telling you that. But I found out sometimes being the "patient" and going to a doctor, I don't see the whole thing "objectively" at times. So my husband usually goes so he can see from the "outside" of the picture, if you know what I mean... My heart goes out to you... my vision has worsened... and my glasses are wonderful BUT seeing double the rest of my like honestly SCARES ME! NOT ONE doctor... really could "diagnose" me... the nature of the "beast" of these Autoimmune Arthritic Illnesses... sometimes even the experts "don't know"... so I find I go in sometimes with MORE research, ask them about it, and pretty often, they will put me on a med I suggest, as stupid as that sounds. "We" as patients spend much more TIME than most doctors do "researching" every aspect of these illnesses... where doctors have to know so much more of a LOT of variety of illnesses, thus they sometimes are not even "aware" of the latest and greatest meds, research and so forth. They just don't have TIME enough to "research" each patients medical issues and symptoms as well as we can... that makes sense... with many patients, their time is limited about everything "new"... This AGAIN is where WE, the IFAA CAN AND WILL get these types of things RESOLVED!!! We can make the difference and we will.... all right I will stop my short "novel"... but I had to tell that... for you Tiffany, for all of us here, and for IFAA, I think those stories from those that are "inflicted" with these AAI can step up to resolve many things!!!


Wow! I know a small "novelette" when I post something like this!!! As I said above, this is why, WE MUST follow our GUT feelings when it comes to doctors, labs, tests, hospital care and so forth. They are all "humans"... of which we know we make mistakes. Many of those errors may not be "on purpose", BUT it still means OUR LIFE AND HEALTH in someone else's hands. So, anytime you are at a physician's office, whether it is for one of the AAI illnesses...OR the flu, ANYTHING, ask questions, if possible take a "observer" with you if possible. A caretaker, spouse (often they are both), a close friend, someone that can help look at the visit "objectively". When often go to the doctor, especially a new physician, and before we go, there is an entire list of things we want to ask. Well, I know for myself IF I DON"T make a LIST, a "physical" one, I will forget half or all I wanted to ask. It could be the doctor "answers" your questions before you have to ask. Yet, I find the opposite. Since they have lots of patients, getting "impatient" waiting, they all tend to me walking out of the exam room BEFORE they come in. There truly is NO excuse for it! BUSY yes most of them are busy, BUT as my own Rheumatologist has told me, they should NOT overbook patients and they do. You should NOT have to WAIT hours when you had an appointment set for months!!!! My PCP used to be so good about you arrived, checked in, sat a moment, and then they were calling you back. My PCP was in the room within 5 to 10 minutes at the very most. 
NOW, 4 years later; my appointment will be a follow up for 3 months in the future. I can almost guarantee, that I will be in the waiting area at the very minimum of 45 minutes. And even if I am called back to an exam room, it maybe 2 hours before he gets in!!!! I can understand if it is a "rush sick appointment". BUT when you have a SCHEDULED 3 MONTH AHEAD appointment, that is plain RUDE and inconsiderate!!! Many of these doctors now have posted in the waiting area, if YOU the PATIENT is LATE for over 15 minutes, they will "cancel" your appointment and reschedule!!! OR the one that really irks me, is that YOU WILL PAY 25.00 or MORE if you don't cancel at least 24 hours BEFORE your appointment! What about OUT TIME? WHY IS IT A "DOCTOR'S TIME" is more important than OURS? We have a life also, and are busy. Thus when we make an appointment way in advance we expect to not have to wait HOURS to be seen. Then by the time they walk in the door, they take a quick look at you barely, and then spurt out a few words, and as I said if I don't have that  YELLOW LIST in hand, mine will be out the door and gone. So, the LIST IS OUT as soon as I am in the exam room in plain sight! Now I totally get that they can't have patients constantly canceling appointments at the last moment, BUT there are "emergencies" that you may not know about until a few hours before that visit! Plus, why can't WE charge them? I've been there mor than once, and "he" has an "emergency" and he wants to change or reschedule, and that is okay. And what about paying us for spending often times HOURS for waiting on them??? Plus I have noticed now a nurse will come in and tell you the doctor maybe running late. But before I might sit there alone in that cold exam room for an hour and much more, and not one soul tell me what is going on!!! I've actually thought when it is a late appointment maybe they just left me there and closed up!!!! And I will say, NOT ALL PHYSICIANS are like this. I have several that are very prompt, and I may not wait anytime at all. But those few that do it to us need to have a course in "manners" especially "bedside manners". 

Okay, I've ranted and raved on this subject enough. I have about 10 irons in the fire now, and probably more that I have forgotten to write down! :) Blame it on the "foggy brain" as one of my friend's says. :)